Nightswimming
by Emmy1512
Summary: Set before the Source blood was injected, based around Helen and Nikola's relationship.  A lake, the moon, and best friends with mixed emotions.  M because there is lemony goodness.
1. Nightswimming

**A/N - because I really do think that something has happened between them. This will be a two part fic, because I wrote all of this first chapter in one hit after hearing Nightswimming by R.E.M. Listen to that. AMAZING. This is set before the Source blood has been injected. At this point in time they are working on it and Helen is promised to John *shudder*. Massive thanks to Maki1131. Also, I dedicate this chapter to the one and only LoveActuallyFan, whose stories make me weep. Go read them. After this.**

* * *

><p>Helen laughed jovially as she stripped down to her undergarments before plunging into the dark lake, lit only by the night's bright moon. Nikola watched her with amusement, sitting on the edge of the jetty, his feet dangling in the water. His shirt was sitting next to him tangled in the pile of Helen's clothing. It always amazed him that the brilliant Helen Magnus, so refined when it came to her work, could lose all inhibitions when it came to nightswimming. It was one of the first things that they had talked about during their friendship. Nikola asked her what her favourite summer pastime was, and she had answered this. Just a few year had passed, but Nikola and Helen's friendship was deeper than ever. Nikola loved her with all his heart, and Helen hid the same feelings.<p>

Druitt was courting her, of course, but he was away for the next month. Nikola was unashamedly ecstatic about the opportunity to spend more time with Helen again. Of course, the Five spent near every day together, working on their project. They were so close to success, they could feel it. But Nikola had dearly missed the time that Helen's smile was his alone to observe. He watched as she dove under the water, and he could see her shadow moving toward him in the water. He didn't move as she came back up just inches from his legs. Without warning her hands grabbed hold of his ankles, a conspiratory grin on her face.

"Oh no, darling. No, no." He tried to stop himself from laughing as the tickling sensation hindered his attempts at pulling his feet from her hands.

"You promised you'd swim tonight, Nidza..." A small pout playing on her lips. She knew that he couldn't resist her when she used his Serbian nickname.

"Oh Helen, but I forgot to bring my swim trunks..." he said, although he knew it would do nothing to help the situation. Helen had seen him in nothing before, more than once, although no one else knew that. She was embarrassed at first, but now Nikola knew that if it meant he was in the water, Helen wouldn't care if he had nothing on but his undergarments.

"Then wear your underwear! Get in the water!" Helen pulled insistantly on his ankles. She was strong, but Nikola's grip on the jetty was stronger.

"Okay, but look away for a moment."

Helen let go of his ankles, and used her kicking feet to keep her afloat as she held her hands over her eyes. "Not looking." A grin formed against her hands as she tried to resist the urge to peak. A flicker of shame flooded through her, before disappearing as quickly as it began. She knew that she shouldn't want to see Nikola near naked. She was promised to John. Yet a part of her knew deep down that Nikola had at least a small piece of her heart that no other man could ever have.

With a splash, Nikola dove into the water next to her, opening his eyes underneath he took a moment to admire her wonderful legs before popping up behind her and gently placing his own hands over hers before she could move them from her eyes and took her hands to spin Helen around to look at him.

"Cheeky..." Helen's eyes shone in the moonlight as she looked at Nikola.

"Happy now, my dear?" Nikola grinned widely as he looked at Helen's blonde mess of hair cascading past her shoulders.

"I'm always happy when you're here, Nikola. I would've thought you'd know that by now. I'm just sad it's taken us so many years of coming here to get you in the water!" Helen laughed as Nikola splashed water toward her. Before Helen could splash back Nikola was under the water swimming away. Helen ducked under the water, following him deeper into the lake for a couple of seconds before Nikola surfaced again. He looked around a moment before he felt Helen surfacing right in front of him. Her face was no more than a couple of inches away from his now, and their feet were touching as the both kicked to stay afloat.

"You're beautiful..." Nikola gasped as he let the words slip from his tongue. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean..." he trailed off, a blush creeping to his skin. Only Helen could make him feel so insecure and yet so alive at the same time.

"You didn't mean that I'm beautiful? Am I to think that you think me unattractive? Oh the pain!" Helen mocked him in jest as she brought a hand to her forehead, letting her body slip back so that she was floating on her back on the surface of the water. "You wound me, Nidza."

Nikola laughed gently, thankful that she didn't let it ruin their mood, but at the same time disappointed that she hadn't realised what he had meant behind the words. She wasn't just beautiful to him. She was the beauty in his life. She was more beautiful than the way the moon danced on the water. He leant back allowing his body to float next to Helen. He stretched out his hand, letting it softly touch hers. Her fingers grabbed one of his, wrapping her hands inside his.

Nikola's heart thumped violently in his chest, his body racked with nerves. He had trouble keeping his breath even. Helen had always had this effect on him, and it was moments like this that gave him hope he had the same effect on her.

Helen turned her head slightly to try to look at Nikola, he had his eyes closed and a small smile graced his lips. She didn't think, nor so much as try to stop herself, as she gently allowed her body to go vertical once more and move silently over to Nikola, trying very hard not to let him notice what she was doing. When she was no more than an inch away from him, she leaned her head forward, pressing her lips against the side of his mouth.

Nikola's breath caught, and his eyes flew open. He moved so that he too was vertical. He looked deep into Helen's eyes.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..." Helen stammered as she began to push back away from him, but he grabbed her wrist pulling her back, his hand wrapping around behind her neck and gently pulling their bodies flush together.

"If you feel as I do, Helen, you most certainly should have. For that matter, it is something that I should done. I should have a very long time ago..." With that he pressed his lips firm against hers. Helen's body sank into the kiss, her lips parting allowing Nikola's tongue to flick against hers. She moaned as she felt Nikola's erection begin to grow, pressing into thigh, subconciously she used what little propulsion she had in the water to rub against him. A deep growl escaped Nikola, distracting Helen for long enough to realised that he had began to slowly move them toward the edge of the lake.

"I love you," Nikola whispered. Helen's body froze, causing Nikola to panic once more. "I just... I thought because... This... And... Damn it!" Nikola pulled away, now close enough to shore that he could stand.

"Nikola, wait..." Tears formed in Helen's eyes.

"Wait, Helen? Damn it, wait for what? Do you want to break my heart some more? Because there is only so much you can crush something before it can't be crushed any more."

His words stung, and the tears forming began to run freely down Helen's cheeks. "No, Nidza..." her voice was timid. He had never heard her speak without confidence before. "I was going to tell you that I loved you too... But I'm supposed to marry, John. You know that. I am supposed to love him, and I do. He is a wonderful man. He loves me, he cares for me."

"Helen, if this is just going to end up as you telling me that we can never be together, then can we please just cut to that part. Because I really don't think that I can handle you telling me about how wonderful Johnny is to you. We both know that would be a downright lie, and I didn't take you for a liar."

"He isn't a bad man, Nikola."

"No, he isn't. But he certainly isn't the best man for you, Miss Magnus." With that Nikola stepped out of the water onto the warm sandy dirt that formed the shore of the lake.

Helen jumped out of the water, following him quickly as he walked away. She grabbed his elbow and spun him around. Before she could stop herself she raised her hand and slapped Nikola deftly across the cheek.

"Don't you ever call me Miss Magnus again, Nikola Tesla. If you do I promise you that the stinging on your cheek will be the least of your worries."

"Helen..." Nikola sighed. He already hated himself for what he'd said.

"I know, Nikola..." Helen whispered. "I love you, I want you to know that." With that Helen walked away, with tear stained cheeks. She picked up her clothes from the jetty, slipping them over her wet undergarments. She too one look back to see Nikola on his knees on the sand, his head in his hands. His body was shaking as sobs ripped through him.

"Oh Nidza... Please wait for me..." she whispered to no one in particular before turning her back for the last time and making her way across the paddocks until her father's house was in sight. The sun was starting to make it's first appearance for the day, and she couldn't help but let out a small sob as she thought of how much easier things had been before John had come along. If only Nikola had asked earlier... if only...

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Oh my god I broke my own heart just now. Give me a review, I'll give you a naked Tesla. Fair? *kisses***


	2. Dayswimming

**AN - So, basically, you owe this chapter to LoveActuallyFan. I do realise that I have dedicated everything Sanctuary to her, but she was the one that told me not to give up when Helen and Nikola wanted to do nothing but talk about their feelings. I hope you love it. Pretty please take the time to review at the end. I can't tell you how much I love them. HelenTeslaKitty, I hope this mends your heart. This version is slightly updated with less errors than the first one I posted about 9 hours ago. Also, read the AN at the bottom.**

* * *

><p>Helen dropped her shoes, lifted her skirt and ran back toward the lake. Her breath was short when she arrived to find Nikola in very much the same position as she hand left him. She ran over to him, and fell to her knees in front of him. Nikola looked up, his eyes red from crying.<p>

"Helen..."

Before he could get any more out, Helen kissed him. Her hand snaking into his soft hair, her body moving forward, pushing him down onto the ground until she lay on top of him. She could taste the salt from his tears on his lips. Nikola wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her hard against him. She wanted to kiss away the pain she had caused him.

Nikola rolled onto his side, successfully placing Helen on the ground as he rolled further so that he was laying mostly on top of her. He pulled away and looked down into her eyes. Helen grinned up at him. "Nikola, you're crushing my leg," Helen squeaked out, trying not to laugh despite this being the most inappropriate situation to have the giggles.

"Oh am I really?" Nikola quickly moved off, trying to think of the best way to keep bodily contact while still trying not to hurt her. In a moment of less than genius (or perhaps it was the best idea he'd ever had) Nikola moved more on top of Helen, ending up kneeling over her. I could see her breath quicken, her breasts moving up and down, a blush creeping up from her dress line.

"You are truly a sight, my dear. Your hair is wet, down, and sandy. Your cheeks are red. You've near ruined your dress..." Nikola teased gently. A worried expression crossed Helen's face, and she opened her mouth to say something but it was Nikola's turn to cut her off. "You look positively..." Nikola took a moment to think of the right word, "irresistible." Nikola grinned and leaned down again, placing soft kisses on the edges of her mouth.

Helen felt her whole body begin to tingle as she realised that Nikola, her Nidza, was kissing her, leaning over her. He was so close. She moved her head slightly as Nikola went to kiss her nose, capturing his lips, eliciting a moan from him. Helen darted her tongue out, stroking his bottom lip, silently begging him for more. Nikola opened his mouth slightly, letting his tongue dance against hers.

Slowly Nikola lowered himself down top of her, trying desperately not to let her see his prominent erection. He didn't want to be presumptuous as to where this was going, but he couldn't help it when Helen mewled gently as his softly bit of her bottom lip. He was desperate to feel her, touch her soft skin, kiss every part of her. He had only done this once... With that thought he found himself pulling away from her. He didn't want to be presumptuous, but he had to ask before this got out of hand.

"Helen..." he started. She ignored him, wrapping a hand around the back of his neck pulling him back into the kiss, raising her hips up slightly and moving one leg out. The action caused the skirt of her dress raise up past her knee, exposing her beautiful creamy white legs to the early morning sun. "Oh dear god," he growled as her hips brushed against his erection. Helen responded my pulling one leg around the back of his legs, caused him to fall on top of her. Nothing would be left to the imagination now. She knew full well what she was doing to him.

"Helen, wait," he managed to gasp out as her free hand began to trace circles slowly down his side on his bare skin. The sensation tickled, but in the best possible way. Helen's hand didn't stop, but she loosed the grip her leg had on him enough to let him pull back far enough to look her in the eye once again. "I know this is probably seems assuming, forward, rude..."

"Nidza, just say it already. Please." Helen's body was crying from the loss of contact. She had barely had a moment to think about this consequences of her actions, merely to accept that she and Nikola would find a way through whatever this would change.

"Are you... I mean have you ever..." he stumbled over his words, struggling to phrase them eloquently enough. Helen looked at him, confusion in her eyes for no more than a moment before realisation took over.

"Oh!" Helen stifled a laugh. "No, I haven't." Helen brought her hand up to stroke Nikola's cheek. He looked so adorable when he was embarrassed. It was such a change from the confident, occasionally arrogant, Nikola she had begun to get used to in the labs. "Have you?"

"Oh... yes... once..." Nikola said shyly. As much as Helen knew she couldn't really be that upset by the news, her heart ached a tiny bit at the knowledge that she wasn't going to be Nikola's first. She stopped at that though. Was she going to give herself to him, here? Now? Was that really was she wanted?

"Helen?" Nikola looked at her, worry filling his blue-grey eyes.

"I want to, Nikola. I want to with you. I..." her voice caught. "I know we shouldn't. We will breaks John's heart. He'd hate me, he'd kill you, he'd leave the Five."

Nikola put his weight on an arm placed inches from Helen's body. "Helen, I don't think there is any way that we can walk away from this... from today without breaking John's heart. I do think that he doesn't have to know... if you and I start this... I think that all he would have to know was that you weren't his. That you couldn't marry him. I also think that John's pride would keep him around the Five. If nothing more than to see the work we have started, finished. Besides that, I have no doubt that if you want him to stay, you could convince him to..." The last thing that Nikola wanted to talk about right now was Helen's current fiance. He wanted to push that thought as far from his mind as possible.

"I want it to be you, Nidza. I love you. More than I wanted to admit to myself, let alone to you."

Helen was becoming painfully aware of Nikola's erection pressing into her thigh, it took her strength to not slide her body down slightly to make it press against more intimate areas. Despite her best attempts, she was wriggling, a wetness between her legs accompanied by a beautiful unfamiliar tingling sensation made her want to finish this conversation as soon as possible. Thankfully Nikola seemed to read her mind, as he proceeded to place a warm kiss on her neck before trailing the tip of his tongue to her collarbone. He pulled away, and the let a soft blow of air from his mouth along the now damp area on Helen's neck. The sensation made her whole body shiver.

Nikola decided that Helen had far too much clothing on, compared to his mere undergarments and slid the shoulders of her dress down, losing the lacing before pulling it down to bunch close to her waist, leaving just her thin under dress between the air and her breasts. Nikola's hand trailed up her side before his hand cupped the side of Helen's breast. Helen moaned, and her own hands began to remove the layer between Nikola's hand and her skin. Without warning. she lifted her body up as much as she could, and slide her clothing down. She pushed her dress past her waist and hips, as far as her hands could push. Nikola took the moment to move back off her and graciously help her to remove the burdensome clothing. His eyes raked over her now nake body, taking in the beautiful sight before him.

Nikola began to kiss the inside of Helen's thigh, eliciting a soft giggle from her as she squirmed. In a quick move, he move his kisses from her thigh to the apex of her legs. A gasp escaped Helen.

"Nikola..." she said, shocked.

"Relax, Helen. Trust me," he murmured against her before darting his tongue out, tasting her wetness. Helen had to admit, it did feel good. She and John hadn't done much at all really. She hadn't felt the way she did right now with John before. Her heart felt like it was about to fly right out of her chest. A knotting sensation was forming in her stomach with each time Nikola flicked his tongue over her. Every time he did she became more sensitive. After what felt like forever, and Helen was sure she couldn't get any higher, Nikola brought his hand up to stroke his fingers over her clitoris as his tongue dove inside her. She couldn't help the soft scream that escaped her as her walls began to flutter, softly at first and then with a sudden ferocity that made her buck her hips upward, desperately seeking more contact. She felt out of breath even though she'd down little more than lay down. A smile tugged at the sides of her mouth.

"What was that, Nidza?" she whispered, unable to get more volume from her mouth.

"I imagine, Helen, that was an orgasm." Nikola couldn't help but smirk. There had been many nights that he'd dreamt of doing that to her.

"Doesn't that taste terrible?" Helen asked, curiosity peaking.

"Oh no, Helen." Nikola shifted so that he was once again lying between Helen's legs. He slowly brought his lips down to kiss hers. He pulled away quickly. Helen's crinkled her nose, making Nikola's heart melt, before she darted her tongue out tasting herself on her lips. She giggled.

"I suppose it's not terrible..." she said hesitantly. Nikola smiled gently, leaning down to kiss her again. Withing moments Helen's hands were pushing Nikolas undergarments away from his body. Nikola helped her, quickly removing them and kicking them off his legs. The two of them lay naked together for a moment. Helen was the first to move, working up the courage and pushing past a wall of nerves to shift so that she could feel Nikola pressing against her.

Nikola felt her wetness against him, eliciting a groan from him. Helen mewed, her eyes begging him to make the move.

"Are you sure, Helen?" Nikola knew it wasn't conventional to double check, but he didn't want the one woman who held the pieces of his heart to walk away from today with the sort of regret she would carry for the rest of her life.

"Nidza, I am more sure of this than I am that... Oh I can't even think of an analogy. I am sure. I love you..." she said softly, her hand stroking his face, coming to rest on his shoulder before she lifted her head to kiss him.

"Helen, I love you." With that he pushed himself gently pushed, feeling her tight walls clamped, Helen gasped. He stopped, seeing her face pained.

"Oh dear God, that is painful." Helen felt tears forming in her eyes. Nikola began to pull out again, his heart beating a hundred miles an hour. "Don't!" Helen stopped him before he could pull out completely. "Please, don't go. Just give me a moment. Please..."

Nikola hated watching her in pain but within a few moments her face relaxed, and she began to move again underneath him. Nikola stayed as still as he could, until a small smile began to return to Helen's lips. "Try again?" she asked him.

He moved his hips again, pushing deeper again. Helen gasped again, and Nikola stopped again. "Damn it, don't stop," Helen begged. Nikola pushed himself completely inside her, pausing a moment before pulling out slightly only to push back in again.

The pain began to subside, giving way to pleasure, and Helen found herself relaxing into Nikola's arms as his soft lips grazed her ear. She moved her head to nip at his earlobe, making Nikola groaned loudly. Helen grinned against him, before doing it again.

"Oh... Helen..." Nikola felt the pressure beginning to build, and he paused. Lifting his head, moving his ear safely away from Helen's seductive mouth. He knew that if she did that again he wouldn't be able to hold on long enough to feel Helen's walls flutter around him. As desperate as he was for release, he wanted Helen's first time to be amazing. He took a moment, before thrusting again.

The pleasure inside Helen began to grow quickly again, still sensitive from her first orgasm. She instinctively moved her hips to meet Nikola's thrust. His hands began to massage her breasts gently, before tweaking her nipples. Softly at first, then harder. Her head threw back, and her back arched. Nikola took the opportunity to kiss her neck, again, continuing his ministrations with his hand. Helen could feel her orgasm approaching quickly, and within moments she cried out as she came hard around Nikola.

The sensation of Helen's already tight walls closing around him was too much for Nikola, and within seconds he gave one last thrust, a strangled groan escaping as he captured Helen's lips with his own.

They lay there together, before without warning, Helen burst into laughter. Nikola pulled himself out, before looking at her with confusion. "May I enquire as to what has made the lovely lady laugh?" Nikola asked.

"I just thought, this is truly a day for firsts." Helen smiled at Nikola, her heart continued to melt for him as his confusion deepened. "Well, your first swim in the lake. For one. The first time you said you love me. My first... sexual encounter... My first orgasm. Now it will be the first time that I swim in the lake in the day time."

"And why are you going for a swim now?" Nikola asked, as smile gracing his lips. The thought of Helen swimming naked made his softening erection twitch again.

"Because can you even begin to imagine trying to explain to my father why we both are covered in sand, and smell utterly dreadful?"

Nikola shuddered at the thought. "You're right, that is an encounter I don't want to have to endure today."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Oh please, review. You have no idea how happy they make me. If you review... I'll give you another naked Tesla? And an angry John. By the way, I am going to turn this into more like a multi-chapter. Because I want to see what happens after. Perhaps I'll go right through up to the episodes we see now? Review if you'd like that. *kisses*<strong>


	3. Crossing off the Days

**AN - This is officially going to be a multichapter. *dance time*. Just so you know, the amount of reviews I'm getting makes me *squee* like a happy bunny. Continue doing that :P. Happy bunnies are very productive and write more.**

* * *

><p><strong>Caen, France<strong>

_Dear Nikola,_

_As I write this, I am trying desperately to figure out how I am going to tell John that I can't marry him. I have decided to tell him that it is because of our work. What's most important to me is learning more about the world, about our science. I don't think he'll believe me entirely, but I am sure it will be enough for him to accept my decision._

_I am sorry this is so short, but I wanted you to know that I miss you, and I think about you every day. I am crossing off the days until you get back. Who would've thought that two weeks apart would feel like forever._

_With love,_

_Your Helen._

Nikola sat in a small room, a smile gracing his lips as he read Helen's letter. It had taken nearly the entire two weeks that he was away for it to reach him. He would begin his travel back tomorrow, and if all went to plan, would be holding his love in his arms in less than 4 days. His travel to France had been less than spectacular. His ideas too radical and his delivery to gruff, however he couldn't seem to dwell on it. His mind kept wandering back to the goodbye kiss he had snuck from Helen.

They had been seeing each other in secret for over a month now, with John being away for the majority of that time. He knew that Helen felt it was wrong, however every time they had decided to not touch, nor kiss, and to remain simply friends until John arrived and Helen could tell him... needless to say their resolve didn't last long. Even as the summer began to turn to autumn, and the days grew colder, he and Helen found themselves at their lake time and time again. Sometimes swimming, most times simply laying on the jetty, hand in hand watching the sky and talking about their work, or the latest happenings at the Magnus residence. It was with pain that he had left, but he knew that John was arriving just days after he left, and he felt it was better that he went ahead with his planned trip. Safer. If John caught wind of what was happening before Helen had a chance to break off their... relationship... Nikola didn't want to be around for the consequences. He had insisted that she didn't tell him before he returned from France, but Helen had been quite adamant that even though John would be hurt, he would not in turn hurt her. While Nikola didn't entirely agree with Helen's resolve that John was a good man, he knew Helen too well the question her judgement. Besides, as the bruise on his cheek from Helen's slap had served to prove, she was a lot stronger than she looked.

Looking out at the night, gas lamps lit the streets of Caen, and Nikola couldn't help but wish Helen was here. The country was beautiful, thriving, not to mention to food. He made a resolution that he would bring her here. He lay back on the bed, and let his mind wander to thoughts of Helen's long flowing blonde hair, how it had tickled his chest when she pinned him down playfully the day before he left. He sighed, his heart thumping, before closing his eyes, waiting for the sun to make its first appearance of the day so that he could be on his way.

"My Helen..." the words drifted from his lips as he let his mind close for the night.

**London, England**

"John..." Helen whispered. She hadn't realised it would be this hard. She knew that she loved Nikola, but she hadn't realised how much she cared for John.

John had his back turned to her. He was angry, livid. But worse, he was sad. He had known, deep down, that Helen wasn't going to be his forever. A man can dream though, no?

"No, Helen. I won't believe that. There's something else. There always has been. Never have you given yourself to me completely. I knew when I walked in here today that something had changed. Your eyes hold something more than sadness at your betrayal of your promise. They hold a secret. Is it James? You two always were close. He would want to put a proverbial sword in my back." His voice was deflated. He was clutching to straws.

Helen stood. "John, do you think your words are going to make me change my mind? Or do you simply intend to wound any further relationship we may have? I don't want you to be gone from my life. I don't want our previous friendship to end. I simply do not want to be married. Not to you, nor any one else." The last part was a lie, and they both knew it. John knew better than to overstep the line further. John stepped forward, reason a hand out. Helen flinched as he extended his arm to swipe away a piece of hair. The action was so tender, so caring, yet there was a ferocity behind it.

"You would flinch from me, Helen? Do you despise me so?" There was hurt in John's voice, but for the first time since Helen had told him that she didn't want to marry him, anger filled it. Before he could stop himself, anger filled his entire body, lifting the same arm again, he let it slam forward, fist closed, into the wall next to Helen's head.

Tears filled Helen's eyes. She was scared, yes. John could see that, but with a steady determination Helen straightened her back, her voice was calm. "Leave John. Please don't come back here until you have calmed yourself. I expect very much to see you next week, we are making such progress with the blood." Her voice reminded him of a lecturer, or a colleague, not a fiance... or ex-fiance.

John considered ignoring her, but he knew that would do no good. The resolve in her eyes told him very well that there was no chance left for them. With one more look at her, John turned to walk from Helen's room.

Helen leaned back against the wall, tears began to trickle down her cheeks, letting out the fear she'd held in. Never in her life had she been scared of John. Not before tonight. Helen couldn't wait for the rest of this week to end, for Nikola to return from France. She had never before needed the feel of a man's arms around her... but since Nikola had been gone, it was all she craved. Right now, she could think of nothing in the world she wanted more.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Also. REVIEWS. Please. Because, let's be honest, Nikola's heart breaks a little when you don't. He would cry. Of course... A crying Nikola gives us all someone to comfort...<strong>


	4. Return

**AN - I wrote a massive note here, then lost internet as I tried to save it. I am on a river, little internet, hence the issues with spelling and grammar. When I do have internet I will post. So PLEASE don't hate on me :) in the space of the past 2 minutes we've had a bee sting, caught a fish, and let said fish go.**

* * *

><p>Nikola looked out the too small window of the carriage, watching the country side pass by, taking mental note of the places he'd take Helen as he passed them. Small places, quiet areas, spots where they could do nothing but lay together, be together. A smile graced his features as he thought about how disgustingly sappy he had become.<p>

"I suppose love will do that to a man," he whispered to the empty carriage as he pulled out Helen's letter. He'd been carrying it in his pocket since he left Caen. With just an hour or so left until the driver would pull up outside his property, Nikola's heart was filled with anticipation. It had been two weeks since Helen had sent that letter. What if she'd changed her mind? Did she break it off with John? Did she hate him for asking her to do such a thing? He read over her words once more. Her words didn't read as angry at all. Wistful, perhaps. Lonely, maybe. More than that though if he wasn't mistaken they read as loving. His heart soared. He still occassionally thought that what happened may well have been a delusional fantasy that he'd brought to his reality via hallucination. The weeks he'd been away, this letter was what reminded him that it wasn't a dream, nor a hallucination. It was real, his Helen had told him with no uncertainty that she loved him, and he had shown her how much he loved her in return, as he'd wanted to do for so long.

The minutes ticked extraordinarily slowly by as Nikola listened to the mud turn to gravel and the horses hooves clicked with a determination. The residences began merging closer together as the entered London. The streets were full, with the Saturday markets providing not just a place to acquire goods, but a place for women to gossip and men to assert their superiority. He wondered briefly if Helen enjoyed shopping before determining that it was more than likely. She was continually well dressed, not just in nice, but often fashionable clothing that seemed to suit her exquisitely. Of course, he may be biased. The carriage weaved through the cobbled streets and then out the other side of London before pulling up to the gates of his residence. The driver dismounted, pushing the gates open before taking the carriage to the front of the house.

Nikola stepped out, taking a small case in his hand before looking up to the front steps leading to the porch. There, with a radiant beauty, sat Helen, looking suspiciously like the cat that caught the canary. She grinned, before jumping up and running over to Nikola.

"Surprise!" she giggled as she threw her arms around Nikola, desperate to feel his embrace. He dropped the case he was carrying, pulling Helen as close to him as he could. She smelt divine, her hair was cascading over her shoulders. It was let out completely, which was a rarity for Helen, but Nikola thought it suited her. It seemed more relaxed.

"I climbed the fence, I hope you don't mind." Helen pulled back, placing a hand gently on Nikola's cheek.

"I don't mind at all, my dear. However I feel I must point out that the gate was unlocked."

Helen blushed slightly, before taking his hand and leading him toward the house. "Nikola you truly should take more care of your property when you're leaving it for such a period of time."

"Oh, but if you can climb the fence, surely a thief determined on my lack of worldly goods would do the same!"

As they entered the large house, Nikola pulled some money out of his waist coat, giving the driver an extra shilling.

"Thank you, sir." He turned away curtly, leaving Nikola and Helen alone in entry way. Helen had been here once before but hadn't taken notice of the lack of furniture. Two paintings hung, one of a young boy and presumably his mother, the other of a cottage in the country side. Helen walked over to the one of the young boy, examining it closely before turning back to Nikola. "This is of you..." It was more a statement than a question. The similarities between the young boy, who couldn't be more than 5, and the grown man standing in front of her were striking.

Nikola nodded, walking to the photo to stand next to Helen. "That's my mother, this was painted just months before we came here."

"Where is she now?" Helen asked softly, her heart begging to know more of the man standing next to her. She could tell you what his face looked like when he was concentrating, that there were flicks of red in his hair when the sun hit it just right, that he was exceptionally hygienic, rarely so much sipping from the same glass as someone else had.

"She lives in the south. I visit her regularly, my sister lives close by her, and often checks in on her. She is quite elderly now. I do wish that I could spend more time with her, but our work here is so important..." a sadness filled Nikola's voice as he spoke. If Helen wasn't mistaken, tears invaded his eyes.

Blinking, Nikola turned away, heading toward the drawing room. "Would you like me to make a pot of tea?" he asked. "I have only Earl Grey, but I must admit I prefer wine to tea."

Helen smiled. "Tea would be lovely." She mused silently that despite the fact his residence wasn't small, by any means, he didn't have any housekeepers that she could decern. There was very little out of place, although there were fine layers of dust in lesser used areas, such as the top of the mantel piece, which cased a fire place that looked as though it was seldom used. She had always known that Nikola was a private man, making her feel especially priveledged to me sitting in his drawing room, talking about his family.

Nikola came back in to the room, a pot of tea on a tray with one cup. Sitting next to it was a bottle of wine and two wine glasses. She smiled at his presumption, before standing to take the tray from him and placing it on a small pine table positioned close to the fireplace. The table looked well used, with stains from various drinks; wine, the most prevelent.

"Along with my lack of any sort of tea other than earl grey, it would appear my milk is spoiled and I have no sugar cubes or honey," Nikola said in way of an apology.

"Tea black and plain is wonderful, thank you Nikola," Helen replied, despite usually taking it with one teaspoon of honey, not wanting to upset him. Helen noticed he seemed rather uncomfortable in his own house. When Nikola sat, he sat up straight, on the edge of his chair, rather than relaxing back into it as Helen had seen him do many times on her lounge. Helen picked up her cup, looking at the seating arrangement. Nikola released what she was doing and softly patted the seat next to him.

"You're more than welcome to seat here, Helen," he said with a smile. She was beautiful when she was thinking. She did so often think too much of things. Helen sat carefully, so as to not touch him, despite her entire being willing her to sit more in his lap than next to him. Curiously, Nikola seemed to relax into his seat the moment Helen had sat down and placed her teacup on the saucer.

Helen turned her body slightly to more or less face him before speaking. "So, tell me, was your trip a success?"

Nikola sighed exasperatingly. "Unfortunately, I am far too advanced in my thinking for their simple minded scientist, not to mention the politicians. There were but two redeeming qualities of the entire trip."

"Oh?" Helen asked.

"The wine, and your letter." Nikola patted his pocket where her letter remained.

Helen's heart swelled, pleased that Nikola had kept her letter after reading it.

"Speaking of... I... I did manage to do what I said I would..." Helen stuttered, nervous that Nikola would change his mind. Not that it would change her decision to leave John, an unhappy marraige, in her opinion, was much worse than the social stigma attached to no marraige at all.

Nikola nodded, his mind flying at a hundred miles an hour.

"I didn't think I could at first. He came in and seemed so happy to see me. He kissed me... I pushed him away... and then... I think he knew after that what I was going to tell him..."

Although he knew it was unreasonable, a fury filled him at the thought of someone else kissing the woman he loved. Nikola turned, softly stroking Helen's face with the knuckle of his index finger, relishing the softness of it. She was so naturally beautiful, he didn't understand why she insisted on powdering her face. "I missed you..." Helen said quitely, closing her eyes at the touch of his hand. It felt as though it had been years since she'd felt him. Nikola's hand snaked around the back of her neck, pulling her in toward him. He softly brushed his lips along hers. Helen was fast to deepen the kiss, her body working of it's own will. Nikola had all but pressed her flat against the lounge, the wine and tea forgotten, and his hands struggling behind Helen to untie the damned dress that was acting as a barrier between he and Helen, when there was a loud knock on the front door.

"Oh, God damn it!" Helen swore loudly before clasping a hand over her mouth. "I'm sorry, that was so crass..."

Nikola just bit back a smile and sat up. "I would suggest you might like to run to the bath room, down the hall, to your right, and fix yourself," he stood up and straightened his pants and waist coat. "I have no idea who that could..." he said quickly, kissing Helen softly once more before making his way to the door as Helen ran as quietly as she could in high heeled shoes down the hall, desperately seeking the bathroom to freshen herself up.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - oooh who do you suppose that is? PLEASE review to save me from the insanity that is the MIDDLE OF NOWHERE. 3<strong>


	5. Angel

**AN - Major awesome props to my darling charteuseian for editing this. You rock my stripey socks. Also, everyone go say happy birthday to her and read her awesomeness after this. *hearts***

**Also, can I just say. OMFG THAT SEASON FINALE WAS AMAZING AND MY TESLEN HEART IS SO HAPPY.**

* * *

><p>"Watson!" Nikola said jovially (as best he could muster at having been interrupted). "I didn't know you planned to come around. How did you know I was back?"<p>

James stepped inside, shrugging off his coat and hanging it on the rack near the door. "I didn't, until I passed by. I noticed the tracks from a carriage on the gravel, and deduced as such. Besides, the gate wasn't locked."

Nikola suppressed a smile at the second assumption of the day that his gate would've been locked if he were away. "Well, yes, I arrived just a short while ago. What can I do for you?" He was trying to be a kind as possible, knowing that Helen would not keep herself hidden in the bathroom, but James was possibly the last person she wanted, or needed, to see her in Nikola's house.

"I came to ask you if you knew that Helen had broken off her engagement to Druitt?"

Nikola shuffled uncomfortable. "Ah, yes, I had heard..." Nikola paused as he heard a door open down the hall and Helen's soft footsteps come toward them.

"James, what are you doing here?" Helen asked, coming to a stop a yard or so too far away from Nikola.

Watson looked suspiciously between the two, before noticing the tea and wine set up but not consumed in the living room.

"Funny, Helen, I was about to ask you the same."

Helen gestured toward the tea. "I had heard that Nikola arrived home today, and came to greet him. I arrived just moments before he did, and so he invited me inside for tea. However, as it happens he has neither honey nor milk," Helen quipped gently, hoping not to offend Nikola. "I have a feeling he prefers to drink wine."

James continued his examination for a moment, before relenting and accepting Helen's answer, despite his feeling that there was something more at play than they were letting on. "Well, I should be off then, I really just passed by to say welcome back."

Before Nikola could agree, Helen spoke quickly. "Oh nonsense, James. You're here now, there is wine and there is still another two hours until the sun sets. There is no reason I can see that we can't all enjoy some time together, outside of the lab." As much as it pained her to have to share the precious moment she and Nikola had with another, she knew that if she just invited James to stay, he may be more inclined to not continue his obvious line of thought. She didn't want to keep her and Nikola a secret forever, but for now, it would make both their lives easier if they were a secret... for now.

"Yes," Nikola said curtly, before walking back to his glass of wine, swallow it all in one go before taking his glass and refilling it, along with a glass for James. He left them sitting there for a moment and made his way to get one more.

"Excuse me a moment, James. I'll go help Nikola find something small for us to eat."

James nodded, turning toward the lounge. He saw something glisten out of the corner of the eye, slid behind one of the cushions of the lounge. He leaned down and picked it up and examined it closely. A hair pin, with intricate design and small glittering jewels. He recognised it to match the other in Helen's hair.

Helen pulled a wine glass from the cupboard. "I'm sorry, Nikola. I just knew that he would..."

Nikola cut her off, glancing around before leaning in to kiss her again. "I know. I just... oh my I want to be alone with you right now."

Helen sighed against his lips, her body begging her to deepen this kiss, but her logic making her pull away reluctantly. "Later."

"I don't suppose you would have any cheese and biscuits?" Helen asked, looking around his kitchen.

Nikola looked around a moment before walking to his ice box. "I do have some cheese, and in my luggage in the entry way I'm almost positive I would have some biscuits." He pulled the cheese from the box, placing it on an island in the middle of the kitchen, and retrieving a knife and placing it next to it. "I'll cut this. The biscuits will be in the smallest bag, right on top of three notebooks."

Helen smiled at his precision, he knew exactly where everything was when he packed it. Nikola's near obsessive nature was what had drawn Helen to him in the first place. Helen cut through the lounge, where James sat, toying with something in his hands. Helen quickly unzipped the bag, retrieving the biscuits before taking them back to Nikola. James looked at her curiously as she passed him the second time, making Helen think that perhaps he had already deduced more than he was letting on.

Helen and Nikola made their way back in drawing room, taking the seats as far away from each other as possible, placing James between them.

"Oh, Helen." James leaned forward, handing something toward her. "I found this nearly down the back of the lounge." James gave Helen a pointed look as she took the object from his hand. A blush crept up her cheeks despite her best efforts as she realised that it was a hair pin, part of a matching set that her father had brought back from his most recent adventure to India.

"Oh, Father would be so disappointed if I had lost this," Helen said, trying to keep her voice calm, in a desperate attempt to hide what James had already figured out.

Nikola mercifully interrupted. "Did either of you make any progress on the blood while I was away?"

"Actually, with both yourself and John away for the majority of the time, we decided to take a break ourselves, focusing more on the history of the blood and the particular vampyre it was extracted from. Unfortunately we came up rather empty handed," James spoke, taking a sip of the wine. "This is exquisite, where did you procure this, Tesla?"

Nikola glanced at the bottle before replying. "That particular bottle I bought while in France. I find it intriguing. It is both spicy, and sweet. However it is soft, and gentle on the senses, while invigorating to drink." Nikola stopped himself before he said that it was the exact reason he decided to share it with Helen, because it had reminded him of her when he drank the other bottle he had bought.

James nodded. "Mmm, it is quite strange. So tell me, Nikola, did you achieve much on this trip of yours?"

Helen stopped herself from grinning as Nikola gave her a knowing look. "I suppose it could have been better. The wine, among other things, did make it worth the effort," Nikola responded, taking another large sip of his drink.

James finished his drink, standing. "Well, I have some other errands I must attend to before I head home for the evening. Do you require an escort home, Helen?"

"Oh no, that won't be necessary. Nikola has some business to discuss with my father, so I'll be sure to make him walk with me." Helen stood, stepping closer to James, taking the glass from his hand.

"In that case, I will be sure to see you both tomorrow. Enjoy your evening."

With that, James took his coat from the rack and closed the front door behind him.

"I didn't know your father wanted to see me," Nikola said as he and Helen walked toward the kitchen.

"Oh, he doesn't. I just didn't want to leave yet, and I could hardly tell James you would walk me home after you had your wicked way with me," Helen said, stepping closer to Nikola, her hand placed against his chest, looking into his eyes.

"Well, yes... I suppose your answer was better." Nikola leaned in, claiming her mouth. His hands were quick to take her clothing to where it was before they were interrupted.

"Far. Too. Much. Clothing." Nikola struggled to get his words out as Helen's lips grazed his neck and her hands quickly unbuttoned his waistcoat and shirt, leaving them hanging open, her nails scratching gently at his skin. Helen laughed throatily at his words before helping him by shrugging her dress from her body leaving her standing in front of him in naught but her petticoat and shoes.

"Oh dear lord..." Nikola managed to force out as he looked down at her before he grabbed her by the waist lifting her to the table in the centre of the kitchen, something clunking loudly as it hit the floor.

"I missed you," Helen moaned as Nikola pushed up her petticoat, removing the final layers of clothing from between them. Helen's hands pushed Nikola's pants down, Nikola stepped forward slightly, letting them pool around his ankles as he claimed Helen's mouth once more, kissing her ferociously, desperate to feel her, taste her. His hand slid from her hip where her petticoat pooled, down to gently stroke her wetness. Helen's hips bucked involuntarily against his hands at the sensation, Nikola pushing one finger inside at her movements.

"Not here," Helen said softly as she tried desperately to retain some sort of composure. Nikola growled, sliding another finger into her tight centre. "Nidza, please. Bedroom," Helen whispered as pleasure started building between her legs.

Nikola said nothing, simply lifting her, holding onto Helen with one arm walking toward the staircase while his fingers remained buried inside her. "Nikola, I trust you, but there is no way on earth you are going to carry me up those stairs." Helen wiggled until Nikola let her go, before making her way two stairs at a time, reaching the top and looking down at Nikola who was simply staring at her from the bottom of the staircase.

"Something I can help you with, Nikola?"

"Helen, that was the most unladylike thing I think I have ever seen, and yet so incredibly sexy."'

Helen looked down at what she was wearing, her shoes, petticoat, and brassiere. "Well it's certainly a good thing I put such little stock into being lady like then, isn't it?"

Nikola said nothing, instead following her quickly up the stairs, leading the way to his bedroom, opening the door to a mostly empty room, except a bed and a wardrobe.

Helen made a mental note to talk to him about buying more furnishings, as Nikola wrapped his arms around her from behind, his hands splayed across her bare stomach, peppering soft kisses down the back of her neck. She could feel his erection pressing into her back. Helen wiggled slightly against it, pressing back into him. Nikola spun Helen around, shoving her petticoats down to the floor.

Helen kicked of her shoes as Nikola undid her bra, shoving it off her body, leaving her standing naked in front of him. Nikola took a moment to admire the amazing specimen in front of him. "Helen, I love you."

"And I love you, Nidza..." Helen whispered, brushing her lips over Nikola's as the stumbled toward the bed.

In a swift movement, Nikola had Helen pinned beneath him on the bed, his erection freed from its material confines, pressing hard against Helen's wet apex. Helen moved her hips up, trying to pull Nikola toward her by wrapping a leg around his waist.

"So eager, my love?" Nikola said softly, brushing a piece of hair from Helen's face, looking into her blue eyes. "I missed you, Helen. Not just this... I missed you."

Helen's hand cupped his cheek gently, "I know, Nikola."

Nikola moved his hand to his erection, guiding it to Helen's entrance. With a gentle thrust, he entered her. Helen cringed slightly, still not entirely used to his length, but within moments she had her legs completely wrapped around Nikola's body, her arms around his torso, bringing his whole body flush against hers as he thrust gently, kissing her neck softly. Helen's body arched back, an involuntary moan escaping her lips. Desperate for control, Helen found herself mustering a courage she didn't know she had and flipped them over so that she straddled Nikola.

Nikola's eyes were wide with surprise, then clouded with lust as he looked over her prominent breasts down her shapely body, hips, then to where they joined.

"Oh God..." Nikola groaned and Helen moved up slightly, bringing herself back down hard, her breasts moving gently with the action. "Helen, you're... oh... I can't... Slower, please..." Nikola grabbed her hips, stilling her, desperately trying to stop himself from coming before her. He used the new found angle to rub her clit with his thumb, making Helen simply rock against him. When Nikola had managed to gain some restraint, he thrust softly into Helen again.

Helen's walls began to flutter, her body tingling. Nikola had lifted his other hand from her hip to squeeze her breast, flicking his finger over her nipple. Desperate for more, Helen began to move up and down quickly, as her walls spasmed around Nikola's cock.

"Nikola..." she moaned as her body was taken over by her orgasm, nails digging into Nikola's stomach.

"Fuck..." Nikola moved both his hands to Helen's hips, pulling her down hard against him as he came hard into her.

Helen lay on top of Nikola, their breathing hard as they came down. After a while, Nikola shifted, so they lay on their sides, still pressed chest to chest. He held his arms around her tight, face buried in her hair.

"The first time I saw you, I thought you were an angel..." he whispered as he kissed her head. When Helen said nothing, he looked down to see her eyes closed, breathing even, sleeping with a small smile on her lips. He chuckled slightly to himself, pulling her close again and closing his eyes, enjoying the feel of his angel in his arms.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - I am STILL on a boat STILL away from civilization, but NOW have interwebs. I don't know how long it'll last, so review to keep me sane? *crazy face* x<strong>


	6. The Five

**AN - A quick and massive thanks to LoveActuallyFan for checking my terrible spelling and such while chartreuseian is off somewhere doing something fun.**

* * *

><p>Helen rolled onto her back, lifting her hand to her face, trying to flick off something that was tickling her face. She felt her hand hit flesh, but didn't feel it on her own body. Her eyes flew open, rolling over quickly, before relaxing when she saw Nikola smiling down at her.<p>

"About time you woke up love, the sun just set. Unless you want the whole town talking, I think now would be an appropriate time for me to walk you home."

Helen sat up, looking around for her clothes before remembering that they were scattered between the bedroom and the kitchen. "I'm likely to require clothing if you're going to walk me home." Helen tried to stand only to find Nikola's arms wrapped tightly around her.

"Mmm, or you could stay naked in my bed for the rest of the night?" Nikola tugged on her, trying to get her to lay back down.

"Oh really, Nikola? It was you who just pointed out that if I don't leave, someone will notice." Helen pried his arms from around her, standing to walk over to where her petticoat lay in a crumpled heap. Slipping it on, she looked around for her brassiere with little success. Turning around quickly, she looked at Nikola accusingly, who was now laying on his stomach, a puppy dog look on his face.

"Well, did you tell anyone, your father for example, that you were visiting me when you left?" Nikola said, avoiding her gaze.

"No, I didn't. However, I did tell James that you would walk me home this evening, and say he decided to check in on me? Do you not think he would be the first to deduce that I obviously didn't leave your house, that I spent the night here?" Helen gave Nikola a threatening look. "Now give me my brassiere back."

Nikola muttered something in Serbian beneath his breath before reaching under his stomach and throwing the bra to Helen. "But you look so much better without it."

Helen fastened it around her before slipping her shoes back on. "Get dressed, Nikola." Helen walked over to the bed, sitting down next to him, running a soft hand over his back. He rolled over and looked up at her. Helen placed her hand on his chest, and leaned down to kiss him. "I promise, soon."

Sighing, Nikola sat up, looking for his pants. "Fine, but am I allowed to give you a goodnight kiss before I drop you off?"

"You can have two." Helen leaned down placing a soft kiss on his lips. "You can give me the second when you drop me off."

Helen woke the next morning to the birds singing but a very fine layer of snow making its place on the window sill. It would melt soon enough, but Helen knew that it meant that there was only a matter of weeks until the winter came. Smiling at the thought of Christmas, Helen dressed quickly, heading down stairs to join her father for breakfast.

"Helen," Gregory said, looking up from a book sitting in front of him. "You and Mr Tesla worked so long in the study last night that I ate supper without you. I do hope you came down to get some for yourself."

Helen fought back a blush before taking a cup of tea. "Oh yes, after Ni... Mr Tesla left, I came down and spoke with Maria for a while before I retired for the evening..." She surveyed her father's expression before determining he hadn't suspected the real reason they were in the study for so long.

"Will you be on campus today?" he asked conversationally.

Helen nodded. "Yes, I expect I'll be home late." Helen bit into a piece of toast with home-made marmalade.

"Again, Helen? I barely see my favourite daughter these days. You work so hard there and for no recognition..."

Helen finished her cup of tea, standing from the table and walking to her father. "I'm you're only daughter, so you can't play the favourite card with me, and the knowledge I'm gaining is enough payment, you know that I don't want recognition. I'm happy enough to simply be there." Helen leaned down, kissing her father on the cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow if not tonight."

The walk to Oxford was long, but Helen read as she walked, not needing to watch her way, but thankful for the fresh air.

"Helen!"

A familiar voice caught her attention, she snapped her book shut, and looked around. "Nigel," Helen smiled as her friend walked toward her quickly.

"I heard about you and Druitt."

Helen rolled her eyes. "News travels fast."

"Yes... well... James told me... he asked... never mind. Are you okay?" Nigel looked at her worriedly. "It's just... you know... you were going to get married..."

Helen smiled. "My dear man, I am perfectly fine. It was my decision."

Nigel nodded. "I did think it might have been... Druitt is desperately in love with you, I could not picture him... well... Nikola's back, did you know?"

Helen walked into their laboratory to find Druitt hunched over a microscope, Nikola uncomfortably scribbling down notes as Druitt barked them out. Both men looked up as Helen entered, Nigel looked nervously at Helen and Druitt before Helen broke the silence.

"Good morning, gentlemen. Has James not arrived yet?" she asked, looking around the room before spotting him in the corner, crouching with an arm under a table.

James stood, a small brown bottle in his hand. "No, I was here in time to find these two squabbling over who would retrieve the bottle of iodine that apparently neither of them knocked off the table."

Nikola gave Helen a sheepish look while Druitt scowled coldly at Nikola.

"How very mature... Nikola, a word?" Helen said curtly before she made her way from the room without waiting for a response from Nikola. He followed her looking like a child who knew he was about to be punished.

"Could you at least try to be nice to him?" Helen looked at Nikola. "If you recall it was you who stole his fiancé, not the other way around."

Sighing, Nikola nodded. "You know I never liked him. That hasn't changed."

"Yes, but you were never outwardly mean to him."

"Fine, but you owe me..." Nikola turned around to walk toward the room. Helen grabbed his arm, pulling him toward her for a quick but deep kiss, causing Nikola to groan. "That's just cruel, my love."

"Be nice," was all that Helen said as she walked in front of him, opening the door to the lab and walking in. "Alright, John. Would you like to fill us all in on what your were working on?"

John stood away from the microscope allowing Helen to look through.

"It appears that the serum has bound to the original cells. I don't see any discernable changes to the cell structure though. Do you have a theory?" she asked John.

"Well, you wouldn't see a change in those cells. Not without a much stronger microscope." John walked to the chalkboard, scribbling quickly as Helen moved, allowing each of the others to take a look.

"Interesting... so you're saying the changes are on the nuclein..." Helen mused. "We were right..."

"Well, yes, we were right. But there is absolutely no way of knowing what it changes without injecting the serum into ourselves..." Nikola interjected.

"Always so hasty, Tesla." James stood as he spoke. "We could always try a smaller subject, a mouse, before we jump in with both feet."

Nigel took his turn, "I agree with James here. The changes will most likely be different for each species, but surely it's worth making sure we won't be killed by simply injecting it."

The men began bickering between themselves, leaving Helen to make personal notes on the possible reasons for the genetic changes. She couldn't help but smile a bit as she watched them so passionately argue their points.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - I know, it's short but I wanted to do something with the Five before they inject it... oh, and I can totally picture Nikola stealing her bra. *squee* Also, reviews? I heart them so.<strong>


	7. Changes

**AN - Awesome thanks to LoveActuallyFan for making me half believe this doesn't suck and for editing it. And for being a lovely little rock while I go through my little Jonathon Young crisis. :P**

**NOW EVERYONE READ HERE. STOP. READ THIS.**

**On the 21st of January three authors from the Sanctuary fanfiction community will be uploading Teslen (Helen/Tesla for the uninformed) oneshots. Yeah yeah, we know, this happens all the time but guess what? There's a twist! We're going to use our totally warped imaginations for philanthropic purposes!**

**For each signed review we receive on these stories, we'll donate $2 AUD (or equivalent) to Sanctuary4Kids (S4K)! The author who receives the most reviews by the 28th of January will also donate another half on top of the amount already raised by their reviews!**

**The participating authors are:**

**chartreuseian**

**Emmy1512**

**LoveActuallyFan**

**We ask all Sanctuary fans out there to step up and give us a review on these stories (they'll be clearly marked so you can't miss 'em). The more reviews, the more money Sanctuary4Kids will get!**

**So come one, come all and support us as we try and turn our obsessions into something that will actually benefit the world!**

**Disclaimer: S4K and are in no way affiliated with the fundraising process and all content belongs to the respective owners (as much as we might wish otherwise).**

* * *

><p>A month passed uneventfully for Helen, their work had reached a plateau, the only next move was for them to inject the serum to themselves. While they were almost certain they would not be harmed, as far as their health went, Helen's worry was more for the genetic changes that were to occur. The test mice used all showed different reactions to the serum, leading Helen to believe that the same would likely happen to The Five. Nikola was ready to jump in, and Helen loved his enthusiasm. They would spend hours debating heatedly, often ending in clothes hitting the floor. After James saw the effects on the mice, he was hesitant but his curiosity had won him over. John was pushing them to go forward. Leaving Nigel, the last of the Five, sitting on the fence, leaning towards trying to finding out more before injecting it. Helen had sworn to herself she would not allow any one of them to inject the blood unless it was unanimously agreed upon.<p>

It was an unseasonably warm night when Nigel came in to the lab, a serious look on his face. "I have decided. I want to go through with this..."

Not much was said as Nikola picked up the vile and needle.

"I should be first," Helen spoke up when the preparations were in place. There was an uproar, all of the men desperate to protect the young woman that not only they loved, but viewed as a strong leader within their group. "This was my idea, and should any harm come to me, none of you, and I mean no one," Helen looked pointedly at Nikola "is to continue."

Nikola looked at Helen. "Helen, may I talk to you?"

Helen nodded, and walked from the room, making sure to go to the side of the building.

"Please, don't go first..." Nikola's voice was low but filled with pain. "I know that I was an advocate for this, but... if something happens to you, I don't want to be here alone."

"And you would think it fair to inflict that pain on me? If you went first and it went wrong?"

Nikola shook his head. "No... I suppose not..." Nikola placed his hand gently on her face. "I love you, Helen. With all of my being. After we finish this... I want to make you happy for the rest of your life..."

Helen smiled at Nikola. "Trust me, Nidza. All you need to do to make me happy is be by my side. I love you too." She stood on her toes, her lips pressing against Nikola's. His hands grabbed her waist, pulling her body hard against his. Still after the few months they'd spent with each other, his desire for her was insatiable. Helen moaned against his lips as his tongue swept along her bottom lip, tasting the candy she was eating earlier. She so rarely ate candy, but when Nikola had bought some on his last trip into London for her, she'd been unable to resist. Especially when Nikola fed it to her.

Helen pulled back first, knowing if she didn't soon she would be unlikely to be able to at all. Being caught on Oxford grounds participating in very unladylike behaviour was not on her list of to-do's today.

Nikola groaned at this loss of contact, but said "We probably should go back in there, shouldn't we..." Nikola pulled her in to him again, this time simply holding their bodies together. Helen could hear his heartbeat as her head pressed against his chest.

"I love you, Nikola."

John sat next to Helen, much to Nikola's distaste, however he made no move to protest. Helen had asked Nikola to be the one injecting the serum, and so he crouched in front of her. He held her gaze for a moment, saying so much yet saying nothing. Helen held her arm out, Nikola brushed his fingers across her soft skin discretely. She nodded at him, and he pushed in the needle, pressing the serum into her system.

Helen gasped, and John grabbed her hand. She squeezed a moment, for nothing more than pain relief before snatching it back again. A twisted smile grew on his lips, and Nikola fought back an urge to cause an immense amount of pain to him. Instead he focused on Helen. She had her eyes closed for a few moments before opening them. She looked around the room frantically before rushing over to a basin. Nikola watched as she emptied the contents of her stomach before rinsing her mouth with her water glass. All the men had looked away uncomfortably. Nikola stood and walked over to her.

"Helen?" he asked tentatively.

"I feel..." Before she could finish her sentence another wave of nausea pulsed through her.

Nikola said nothing, simply rubbing her back in comfort as Helen fought back tears.

"Continue..." she said nothing else, but Nikola knew that she thought it was safe for the others, despite her obvious illness.

John was injected next, his reaction less severe to Helen's, then James who noticed nothing at first, Nigel went before Nikola, his reaction similar to Helen's before his form flashed and flickered. Helen, seemingly beginning to recover from the nausea after a few hours, walked over to Nigel. "How strange..."

A terrified look consumed Nigel's face. "Helen... what's happening?"

"I'm not sure, Nigel... can you control it?"

He shook his head. "No... I don't think so."

"Concentrate, try to make it stop."

Nigel sat with his eyes closed for a few minutes before slowly he began to gain some semblance of control.

Nikola sat with the last needle in his hand, toying with it.

Helen placed a gentle hand on Nigel's shoulder before making her way across the room to Nikola. "Are you okay?" she asked quietly, looking at the needle.

Nikola nodded. "I wanted to wait for you. Would you?" He held the needle out to Helen. His hand was trembling. Helen took it from him. "I was scared for you, Helen..." His hand stroked over her cheek.

"It'll pass, Nidza."

* * *

><p>A day passed, and while Nikola felt nothing from the blood at first, slowly he began to develop a raging fever. Fearing illness, he isolated himself from the rest of the Five, who were beginning to come to grips with their changing. John's had been the most bizarre so far. Shortly after injecting the blood, there had been a flash, and he had seemingly disappeared, before walking back through the door moments later. Naturally, Helen had been fascinated, John had demonstrated time and time again as he held her attention. Nikola spent the time talking with James, as Nigel sat with them, flickering in and out of view, sometimes it appeared as though it were just clothing floating in midair.<p>

As the day turned to eve for Nikola, he felt his body begin to change. There was a burning in his throat, pain rocketed through his body time and time again. With a wave of pain, Nikola roared, his arms stretching out.

Helen walked into Nikola's house, noticing the lack of open bottles of wine. She had to wait until the evening to visit him, the pain of being away from him as he got sicker was almost unbearable. Helen knocked tentatively on Nikola's bedroom door. When she got no answer she pushed it open. Standing in the middle of the room stood Nikola, his hands outstretched. His nails were long, and dark, she could see that even with the lack of lighting in the room.

"Nidza?" she asked quietly, a small part of her was afraid.

He turned slowly toward her, Helen fought back a gasp. The man in front of her was her Nikola, definitely, but his eyes were taken over by large black pupils, his teeth were turned to razor sharp fangs, and those nails...

"Helen..." Nikola was apprehensive. The pain had left him hours ago, however the burning in his throat was unquenchable. Helen took a small step forward, causing Nikola to step back quickly. As she moved closer to him, he could smell her blood and the desire to drink it was near overwhelming. "Please stay away..."

His words cut through Helen, the pain like a hot iron against her skin. "What?" Her mouth hung open slightly, before she shut it, tears forming in her eyes.

"No... it's... blood... I can... smell..."

His words were incomprehensible and yet they made sense to Helen. She nodded, and sat on a chair near the door as Nikola stood two yards away, trying desperately to focus on something other than how wonderfully delicious his love smelt.

"When did this happen?" Helen asked quietly, toying with a thread on the skirt of her dress. She rarely felt nervous in his presence, but her mind was running in overdrive, trying to decide on the best way she could help him. The thought of him feeding off her flashed through her mind once or twice. She had read very old papers on the sensation, and from what she had read, it was more than pleasurable.

"I've been ill for days now... This, however, only happened a matter of hours ago. It was painful, at first. Not so much now. I'm starting to control it already." Helen noticed his voice was deeper than usual, a dark tone to it.

"We can try to fix this, Nidza. I am sorry..."

Nikola's head snapped up. "Fix it? Helen! Look at me! It's outstanding!"

Helen frowned. She couldn't imagine having to go through this, but he looked almost as though he was enjoying it now. She watched as he retracted his nails and his teeth returned to normal, his eyes back to their grey blue.

"Nikola, you're going to need to drink blood!" Helen didn't mean to but she stood and her voice raised.

He flinched back, and looked at her. "You think I don't know that, Helen? I don't pretend to have this all figured out. It's new to me too!"

"You're too afraid to let me so much as touch you..." She knew it was selfish, but she was angry at him for not being able to so much as touch his cheek.

"Helen," Nikola took a small step forward, steadying himself before taking another. He now stood two feet from Helen and he could see her pulse beating on her neck.

"You can drink from me." Helen had blurted out the words before she could stop herself, a hot red blush rising up her neck to her cheeks. "Sorry..."

Nikola's vampiric form fought desperately to make an appearance. He turned way, the temptation to just taste her was nearly overwhelming. That wasn't his only problem though. He could smell, everything. She was aroused. Even just a small bit, it was enough to make him nearly crazy with need for her.

He heard her small footsteps approach him. Her hand touched his shoulder, and in an instant Nikola's eyes darkened once more. A growl ripped through him as he swung around quickly, grabbing Helen by the shoulders and shoving her hard against the wall. He pressed his mouth onto hers, his hands still holding her shoulders tight.

Fear pulsed through her body as Helen squirmed against him. His kisses were hard and frenzied. It wasn't until he released her shoulders that Helen relaxed slightly, she began to kiss him back, carefully at first, before letting go and giving into her desires. It had been too long, and simply sitting in his presence, the thought of him drinking from her... It had been sending her crazy nearly the entire time she'd been there. She undid the buttons on his shirt painfully slowly, her hands shaking.

Nikola's hands, now stronger than ever, ripped through the lacing of her dress, the entire thing falling to her feet. The same with her undergarments until he left her standing in front of him with nothing on her. Her body shivered against the cool of the air. Helen pushed Nikola's pants from his waist, they bundled around his feet before he stepped out of them.

Helen wrapped her legs around his hips, Nikola pushed her hard against the wall, holding her with just one arm. His free hand stroked her wetness gently, before plunging a finger in, causing Helen's head to fall back and a loud cry to escape her lips. He could smell her pulse beginning to quicken, feeling every tiny change in her body.

"Helen... I need to..."

"Please..." Helen didn't let him finish his question, she flicked hair back from her neck, tilting her head to the side. He hesitated for a moment, before skilfully sliding down and placing her creamy white thighs on his shoulders. He licked her softly before turning his mouth to her right thigh. He could smell the blood, his fangs bared against her skin. Helen moaned his name, pressing her thigh against his mouth. Nikola bit hard, eliciting a cry of pain from Helen as the blood seeped into his mouth.

The pain was excruciating to start, before slowly ebbing into a pleasure that coursed through her entire being. Nikola's fingers still in her began to move once more and Helen gently thrust against them. Her walls fluttered before clamping down hard around them as Helen cried out his name. Nikola pulled away from her, having drunk enough to satiate the desire. He grabbed onto her legs once more before moving back up.

"I love you, please always remember that," he whispered as he slid his manhood into her.

As he thrust quickly, Helen could taste her blood on his lips. It wasn't unpleasant, just strange. The feel of him inside her began to quickly unravel her as she felt every stroke. He began to groan into her mouth. Helen felt a heat begin to build in her before reaching the peak. Her entire body felt like it was floating as the pleasure ran through every inch of her. Nikola came hard inside her, before collapsing onto his knees, holding Helen on his lap.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," he sobbed against her neck. Helen cupped his face with both hands, stroking away his tears.

"Nidza... I wanted it too..."

They sat like that, Helen stroking her hand through his hair and along his back, holding him as he cried into her.

"I promise you, my love. I will find a way for you to live with this, without having to drink. I won't rest until I figure it out..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Review? AND GO LOOK AT OUR PROFILES FOR INFORMATION ON HOW WE'RE RAISING MONEY FOR SANCTUARY4KIDS.<strong>


	8. Haunted

**AN - I am so sorry this is so short. I got stuck so this isn't what I was going to write... but I kinda like it a little :P I massive thanks to my snuggle buddy LoveActuallyFan who really, no shit, is fucking awesome. She also read this over to make sure it made sense (I wrote most of this at 6:30am when the freaking birds woke me up). *snuggles her***

**Go to my profile and read about Fanfic4Kids. I expect a million reviews on my oneshot loading on the 21st of January.**

* * *

><p>Helen's eyes were sore, her body exhausted, she couldn't concentrate. She didn't remember the last time that she'd eaten a proper meal. Her empty tea cups started to build in a precarious pile next to her. Nikola sat in the corner, shaking uncontrollably. Since their night together after the blood, things had gotten worse. Nikola could barely function without drinking, and yet he refused to take more from Helen. She could see the deterioration in his condition, he could barely function.<p>

She'd been working day and night, sleeping only when completely necessary to try to find a way to fix this. She'd given up on reversing the effects of the Source Blood, now her only choice was to form a concoction that would satiate Nikola's desire for blood. She took the beaker from over the burner, and poured it into a clean cup and took it over to Nikola. Her heart broke just looking at him, when he lifted his head she could see he'd been crying. Lately he'd taken to blaming himself for drinking from Helen and for making her work like this. No matter how often she told him to stop, he wouldn't.

Nikola looked into Helen's eyes. He could see she was tired, her vibrant blue was now a lifeless grey. She was tired of trying, he could see that. He didn't understand why she still did. Surely she couldn't still love him after how he'd defiled her. Her hands felt soft as they ran through his hair gently, coaxing his head back, holding the cup to his lips. He took a small sip, forcing himself to swallow despite all his instincts telling him to spit it out, when he found it didn't burn like the others she'd made he swallowed the rest in one quick gulp. Helen sat next to him, her skirt bundled around her. He waited, before shaking his head. "At least it didn't hurt this time..." he offered meekly. Helen let out a pained sigh. He could see it was getting to her. He'd never seen her determination falter before, not when she thought something was possible.

"Helen, I'm going to go home."

She could see it took all of his strength to simply stand, she could hardly let him be alone in this state. "Nikola, you can't," she said timidly.

An irrational anger swept through his being. "Why, Helen? Do you not trust me to not go out there and terrorise the town?" he all but yelled.

Helen flinched, but didn't back away. "No..." was all she could muster as she stopped herself from crying in front of him. It wasn't so much that she was worried what he'd do if he left, she was more worried what she'd do if he left. She didn't want to feel the pain of losing him yet, even though it was becoming painfully obvious to her that he was pulling away.

Nikola stepped slowly at first, and Helen didn't reach out her hand to stop him. He stopped, considering kissing her softly and telling her he'd be back. Looking at her he saw her looking at the ground. He stepped again before moving as swiftly as he could manage to the door.

Helen heard the door shut softly behind him. She looked around to the small window at the top of the room. The sky was a magnificent shade of purple as the sun began its rise. Two days without sleep. Helen turned off the gas and stored away the ingredients she'd been using. She pulled herself from the room and up the two flights of stairs to her bedroom, her body screaming with pain with every step she took. She bit her lip, checking around the corners for maids before she slipping into her bedroom. Closing the door, she leant against it. Letting out a small cry, Helen began to cry freely. Anger coursed through her, a frustrated scream ripped through her. Her arms wrapped around her middle, her body falling limply to the ground. She lay, sobbing painfully. It was only when a tentative knock came at her door that Helen pulled herself up.

"One moment," she tried to sound confident. Walking over to a water basin she splashed some water on her face and went back to answer the door.

She was startled to see her father standing there. She could count the number of times he'd come to her room since she became an adult on one hand, the most recent being the day he had decided to inform her of his work with Abnormals.

"My darling girl..." he said before stepping into the room and wrapping his arms tightly around her. Helen put her face on her father's chest, tears beginning to fall again. She'd forgotten how it felt to be comforted by her father. He wasn't ever cruel, and had she gone to him, he would've dropped everything to help her. Helen however had stopped making her way to his lab for a midnight cup of tea as she grew older.

After a few moments, they walked over to the chairs by her window, sitting in silence as Helen continued to sob into his chest.

"Tell me..."

Helen sat up and looked at her father. He could help her, she knew that much.

"I don't know where to start..." Helen's mind flittered through a thousand different moments over the past three years that had led to this moment.

"At the beginning, I find is always the best place to begin a journey..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Oh Gregory, he's got to be one of my favourite part time characters. So wise. Anyhows, review? I love them very much...<strong>


	9. Time and Time Again

**AN - I know it's been a week or so, and you have my sincerest apologies - well, half sincere, because in that time I was working on my Fanfic4Kids fic which is POSTED and awaiting your review. $2 for every review on that will be donated to Sanctuary For Kids so if you haven't already please, take 10 minutes of your time to help me beat LAF (LoveActuallyFan) in the race for reviews. I'm a bit competitive. This particular one is dedicated to alwayssmilingsam, because her fic doesn't get enough recognition for it's awesome-sauce-ness. It has a promise of Teslen! Read it after you do everything else I've told you too. *whips***

"How could you be so reckless? You've seen the creatures I work with, you have seen how dangerous so many of them can be. Why would you experiment with the blood of an abnormal that you know is dangerous. The chance was one in a million that Mr Tesla would react this way, but that risk is too high." Gregory ran his hand over his face roughly. He knew his daughter well, and if he'd known she was in possession of the blood - he could have guessed that this is what she would do with it.

"Father I know, and I am beginning to be truly sorry. However there is no changing what I've already done. I need your help. Nikola refuses to drink... I need to make a substitute, father, but each thing I come up with is either not potent enough or so much so that it burns his throat."

He looked at her daughter, taking in her desperate expression. It was clear to him how much she cared for Mr Tesla, and he briefly wondered if her desperation was caused by something more than concern for a friend. "I know of ways for other creatures to live without blood, there are others who require such treatment. To make it for a Sanguine Vampire... well that is something that I never thought I'd need to consider in my life time." Gregory's head shot up, a sudden realisation filling him with dread. "Helen, where is he?"

"He went home. He walked out." Helen felt tears coming again. She hadn't told her father of their relationship but if she continued at this rate she wouldn't have to.

He stood from the sit. "Rest, Helen. I will go and find him. He can not be alone. We can not risk that. I'll send Claudette with a fried breakfast and tea. I expect you to be asleep when I get back. That is not a request." His words were stern but his demeanour tender as he leaned in to give his daughter a gentle kiss on her forehead. Helen nodded, before standing herself and walking to the mirror to unclasp her hair and run the brush gingerly through it. Slowly she stripped off her layers before placing a nightgown on and slipping under the covers. A soft knock came on the door before it was pushed open, followed by the petite handmaiden bringing in a covered tray that wafted a delicious smell throughout the room. Helen's stomach was settled by the knowledge that her father would be out finding Nikola. He was the only person that she would trust to help her amend the current situation.

"Ma'am," Claudette nodded politely at Helen before placing the tray on the bedside table. She walked toward the door before pausing. "If I may be so forward, ma'am. No man is worth the tears of a woman as intelligent and lovely as yourself."

Helen couldn't help but smile. She'd known Claudette for close to ten years now, and the young girl she'd befriended had quickly grown to a mature young woman whose eyes sparkled when she talked to Helen.

"Thank you, and please, I've asked you many times, call me Helen. Ma'am makes me feel old."

Claudette smiled before exiting the room.

Helen sat the tray on her lap, taking off the lid and cutting off a piece of the toasted bread, and placing a piece of egg on top of it. She savoured the taste, before her stomach rumbled, reminding her of how long it had been since she ate. Helen devoured the contents of the plate before sipping at her tea. Her eyes began to feel drowsy, and with the curtains drawn shut her body began to relish the idea of sleep. Soon she felt herself slip down into the covers and close her eyes, letting sleep take her over.

Helen woke to the sound of hushed voices outside her door.

"I must see her," a familiar voice insisted, followed by her fathers adamant response that she wasn't to be disturbs.

Helen sighed, noticing that the sun was now low in the sky and pulled herself from the bed. She was in desperate need of a warm bath, however given the insistence in James' voice, she opted to freshen her face and clean her teeth instead and pulled a clean dress on. After pinning her hair as best she could in such little time, Helen, now filled with her previous strength, walked quickly out of her room and downstairs. It didn't take long for her to find them. They sat, talking quickly and quietly in her father's lab. Her father had taken to James quickly when they'd first met. Their mutual love of medicine and Latin made their conversations long and never tiresome.

"Helen!" Both men stood quickly. "I wasn't aware you were awake," her father spoke as she walked toward the pair.

"Well, evidently I've been asleep for quite some time so I suppose it's a good think I am," she shot back at him, somewhat annoyed that he'd let her sleep for so long knowing the situation at hand. However, her logic knew she should be grateful. She would be no help to Nikola in an overly emotional, overly tired, undernourished state.

"Gregory, if it is alright with you I'm going to take Helen for an evening walk around the grounds. We have much to discuss."

He nodded at smiled, clearly quite happy at the idea of James being alone with Helen. She wanted to roll her eyes, instead walking in step with James from the laboratory and up the stairs to the ground floor.

"How long, Helen?"

Helen looked at James, unsure as to what he was asking.

"How long have you been in love with Nikola, and he with you?"

**AN - Meep! Yeah, Helen, how long? Hmm? Review please. DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW FANFIC4KIDS. LAF is winning and that makes me grumpy :P I wanna be broke too!**


	10. For Now

**AN - This is so short and I am so sorry BUT I wasn't even going to write this scene. I was going to skip over Helen and James' interaction and just write a little oh and it worked itself out blahblah memory. Then they started running around in my head and then I cried and then the world cried and then I ate chocolate and then LoveActuallyFan abandoned me to do something she deems important and I'm posting this now as punishment because she can't read it right now because she is without internet access and that makes me LAUGH, and when I laugh the world laughs. And we all eat chocolate...**

******_Awkward cough_** **so, go read this now...**

* * *

><p>Helen blushed, wishing for a moment that something dramatic would happen and give her more than the few seconds James had given her to answer.<p>

_How long..._

"I'm unsure exactly how long..."

James looked at her, trying to gather more information from her body language. "I knew you two were close. You were inappropriate together, the scandal of the town. I can't believe it took this damned experiment for me to realise that you _loved _him. At least I found something to occupy my mind for the time that you two disappeared." A pained expression took it's place on his face. Helen knew he'd been having troubles, however hadn't realised how deep they were running until now.

"James..." Helen begun worriedly.

"No, no. We'll discuss that later," he cut her off. "If you don't know how long you've loved him, how long have you been running around together behind all our backs? What about John, Helen? He loves you."

"You think I don't know that?" Helen snapped back, James startled and lookat her her taken back slightly. "Yes, perhaps John does love me. I am not going to give myself to a man purely because he loves me. I am free to love whom I wish."

"You didn't answer my question, Helen. How long have you and Nikola been playing this little game of yours?"

"How dare you, James?" Helen's eyes filled with tears. She knew she was being unreasonable. James was one of John's closest friends, and she and Nikola had betrayed the trust the group had. "It certainly is anything but a game."

"I didn't mean you being utterly smitten with the most arrogant man I know is a game, I meant hiding it from _everyone_ who thought they were your friend, what about your father? Does he know?"

Helen turned away from James, pulling her arm from James' grip.

"Helen, surely you know asking me to keep this from John is... inconcievable?" James made his way to stand in front of Helen again, looking deep into her eyes.

"I never set out to hurt him, James. I did love him, I suppose. I had every intention of marrying him. He is a good man. I do feel happy when he is around, and yes we talk about some of the most thrilling ideas in todays science. Nikola, though, I feel ecstatic around. We make new theories together, not simply talk about ones that others have formulated. Not just that though, when I am around him, I feel alive. He makes me feel as though I am his equal. He comes to _me_ when he has an idea."

James searched her expression, looking for some falter in her resolve. He didn't want either of his good friends hurt. His moral conscience was being ripped in the game of tug of war. Eventually he sighed, placing a head on her shoulder and guiding her to continue walking the grounds. "You never were a conventional lady, were you?" James spoke, and Helen could hear the lightness returning to his tone. Relief flooded her as they returned to their normal chatter. For a few moments, Helen was able to push aside the thought of Nikola suffering, knowing that he was in good hands with her father for now. She would return later, but for now, it was time to help another friend.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - please don't hit me for the short tidbit. Hitting me makes me cry and we've been through this. Also a quick but oh so epic to be sung about by poets for thousands of decades to come THANK YOU to everyone who made Fanfic4Kid a success. In total we raised over 500 Canadian dollars that has all been donated to Sanctuary for Kids. I do hope to do it again in the next year but right now I'm buying uni textbooks and am so so so so poor...<strong>

**Anyhow, review? xx**


	11. Nothing Without Love

**AN - Massive big thanks to chartreuseian for being the best and editing this for me. Cos, ya know, I was tired and all the letters begin to look the same after a while.**

**This is dedicated to alwayssmilingsam who made me feel epicly less crap with her review on her last chapter. Go read her stories, now. Actually, after this. I love her.**

* * *

><p>"I think this is it…" Helen mused to herself as her father put the final touches on the medicine he'd spent the past two days working tirelessly with Helen to devise. Gregory made a noncommittal noise, nodded his head slightly.<p>

Pouring part of it into a glass, Gregory made his way for the door. "You don't have to come with me Helen, but I think he'd be eased by your presence. I know so little of your friendship but he obviously cares for you deeply, as you for him…" Gregory looked at Helen closely, examining her reaction. Helen nodded, and walked with her father. They knocked softly on Nikola's door before making their way in. He looked utterly terrible, the bed sheets were strewn across the room, and claw marks were ripped down the bed posts. Nikola was sitting on a chair near the window, staring out at the darkening sky.

Helen opened her mouth to say something but thought better of it and let her father walk in the room in front of her.

"Nikola, we need you to try this…" Gregory said gently. It was a shock to hear her father use his given name but Helen realised that in Nikola's current state, he was using what he had to keep Nikola with them as best he could.

"No, no more." Nikola didn't look at them. "I'm tired of your experiments. Just leave me alone."

"Nikola…" Helen said, scared at his tone.

Gregory placed a hand gently on Helen's shoulder. "Darling, just stay here a moment, please." He walked over to where Nikola sat hunched, and sunk onto him knees in front of him.

"Nikola Tesla, my daughter has worked tirelessly to try to help you. From what I know, you were a willing participant in this, which got you into this mess in the first place. You may not know much about myself or my family, but know that if you hurt my daughter by feeling sorry for yourself or in any other way, being a vampire will be the least of your worries. Now drink."

Helen stood there, shocked as she watched her father berate Nikola. Slowly, Nikola reached out his hand and took the cup from Gregory. He took a hesitant sip, and waited. After a minute, he took another sip before drinking the lot down in one gulp. Nikola sat there, staring at the empty glass before looking up at Helen. His eyes were completely black, a look of concentration on his face. Slowly, his pupils began to shrink and his irises reappeared. Helen began to smile, but Nikola turned away and handed the glass to Gregory.

"Better, I need more though," his voice lowered, "please take Helen with you."

Helen felt as though a knife had stabbed through her stomach. She wanted nothing more than to help Nikola, to have him back to being her Nidza. To hear him ask her father to take her from the room hurt more than words could explain. Gregory looked as though he were about to say something, but Helen spoke first. "Father, it's okay, I'll leave," she managed to say through the lump in her throat. She turned and walked toward the door, hearing her father's footsteps behind her.

"Helen, stop." Gregory's voice was stern as she walked quickly down the corridor toward her room. She slowed, considering disobeying him, before she stopped completely, not turning around.

"Now that I've done that for you, I think we need to have a very long talk about some things. I think you owe me a few more answers than you've given."

Helen bit her lip, her heart rate increased, and her damned dress was feeling tighter and more constrictive by the second.

"Father please…" her voice was low and pained. She didn't want to discuss Nikola, she didn't want to talk about the John, all she wanted was to run far away from all of this. She knew it was childish and she knew it wasn't how she was raised. She was always taught to be brave and strong and always fair. Now though, she was tired of being strong for everyone else around her.

"Helen Magnus. You are my daughter, you may be an independent lady, and of that I am unendingly proud of you. However you are not invincible, nor are you above scandal. I never wanted to impose rules or regulations on how you live, but you have broken off an engagement to one of the brightest and most well respected men at Oxford, nearly ruined the lives of four people you claim to be your friends and you obviously are much closer to Mr Tesla than you led me to believe. That man in there is not just sick, he is broken hearted. I suggest that you sit down and explain this to me, from start to finish."

Within the hour Helen was sitting in Gregory's lab. Nikola had now drunk two glasses of the medicine and was resting, there was enough made to last three months. Gregory had given it to Nikola on the condition that it was taken three times a week, or whenever he felt any desire for blood. Helen's hands were folded in her lap to stop her from fidgeting, and Gregory had a glass of wine in his hand. Helen's glass sat untouched on the bench. The taste reminded her of Nikola, and it was not her intent to cry in front of her father again.

"Do you intend to marry him?" Gregory asked, obviously unhappy about the relationship Helen had explained to him, in as little detail as required.

"To be truthful, father. I don't know. I had hoped that it would end up there, however now… I doubt Nikola would want that."

Gregory nodded, deep in thought. "I suppose that is something you'll need to discuss with him. I doubt I have much say in the matter either way." His tone said he was hurt that Helen had not told him of the relationship sooner.

"Helen, as my daughter you have my unconditional love. I need you to know that. I do not disapprove of you being courted by Mr Tesla; if you love him then… you love him. You're old enough now to know that consequences of the actions you choose, despite how reckless, how foolhardy you can be. It is no longer my place to stand in the way of that. Please just be very careful, Helen. You don't want to ruin your place at Oxford by scandalling yourself. I know that the place means more to you than any man."

Helen walked quietly up the stairs, thoughts running through her head as she made her way to the guest room Nikola was in. She knocked on the door softly and stood there, hoping for an answer. When nothing came, she began to turn to leave. Taking two steps, she changed her mind, turning back to the door and opening it swiftly.

The room was empty. The curtains were open, the bed made. All of Nikola's belongings were cleared out, and the medicine Gregory had left with him gone. Confusion coursed through Helen as she stepped into the room to look around. If she hadn't known that he was here just hours before, Helen would've suspected the room hadn't been used. A piece of paper sat on the bed with Nikola's scrawled handwriting. She picked it up and began to read.

_Helen,_

_I suppose by this point you've realised I have left. Of course you have if you are reading this letter…_

_I want you to know that I love you, with all my heart. You are the most amazing woman I have had the pleasure of having in my life… which is why I won't be coming back. I really don't know how to explain to you the reasons I have. I suppose it would be much easier to explain if I were talking to you in person. I was never good at making notes. The only reason I am not standing in front of you saying goodbye is that I know I would not be able to bring myself to leave._

_I can't hurt you, Helen. If I stay I know undoubtedly that it is what I will do._

_I am not sure where I will go. Somewhere with little human contact for a while I suppose. Somewhere I can learn to control myself completely without risking the safety of the person I care about._

_I will ask nothing more of you. Only this. Please do not come looking for me._

_Forever yours,_

_Nikola._

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Well that's a bit sad. Want it to be better? Review and I'll make it better - slowly, but I promise I will. No review means angst and no Nikola and Helen. Do you want to do that to them? Do you WANT that on your conscience? No. *kisses*<strong>_  
><em>


	12. The Days Pass

**AN - I actually have not much to say. I'm participating in another challenge to raise money for Sanctuary for Kids. To see more about this go to: two-dollars-a-day(dot)blogspot(dot)com(dot)au**

**This is dedicated to... HelenTeslaKitty ! Because... 69. *giggles***

* * *

><p>"Helen, are you…"<p>

"James, please. I am perfectly fine. I do wish people would stop asking me though. There is no reason I wouldn't be." They both knew she was lying, but Helen was tired of reliving her emotions. In the two weeks since Nikola had left, Helen had slowly begun to regain some semblance of control over her emotions. It had helped she'd thrown herself completely into studies at Oxford, and assisting more and more each day with her father's work with Abnormals. Helen shot James a look telling him to watch what he said in front of so many people. James had kept his word and not told John of her and Nikola's relationship, though she suspected it had more to do with the fact that it had come to such an abrupt and painful end than his loyalty to Helen.

"Your father has asked me to accompany the two of you to India, in search of a particular rarity he has learned of."

Helen nodded, not saying anything. Gregory's decision to allow James to know about his work was an easy one for Helen to approve. It gave James something to keep his mind occupied. He had also begun consulting with the Police on their investigations. His ability to see past what others say was an invaluable skill, and one they had offered to pay handsomely for. James had turned down the payments at first, but was now allowing them to pay him a small amount for the cases he solves.

"Would you prefer that I remain in London?" James looked at Helen quizzically.

"No, James. I think your company would be wonderful. To be honest I'm worried I won't be much fun. I have so much work to do in addition to helping Father."

James had been watching her for the past week; he could see what she was doing. Keeping herself so occupied she barely had time to think about Nikola's departure. "I am positive that if you leave your work here for two weeks, not only will it not spontaneously combust, making you do it all again, but maybe you might have a bit of fun."

Helen looked at James exasperatedly. "You're not going to let me do anything should I bring it, are you?"

James pretended to consider it for a moment, before shaking his head. "No, probably not."

Helen smiled softly truly grateful to have James as a friend.

"It will be okay, Helen…"

Helen sighed. Nikola had asked her not to look for him. He hadn't specifically said that she couldn't ask others to listen for any information of him. "Have you heard anything?"

"There were rumours of a beast of the night in France. Unfortunately those rumours seem to be unsubstantiated. Purely rumours. I have to say though, if he really didn't want to be found, Nikola would know we would look first in the places he used to be fond of. France… it really is unlikely. There is no word of any new activity in Serbia, and none of his family has received any communications from him…"

Two months passed slowly for Helen, with the days she stopped asking for news on Nikola, began to push him from her mind, and by the morning they woke early to leave for India, he wasn't the first thought to enter her mind for the day. Helen found herself smiling at James and her father as they entered the carriage. The air was cool, and winter was beginning its approach, but the early morning sun was warm on her skin and Helen found herself glad to be leaving London as the carriage hit the rough roads toward the port.

As they arrived, Helen took in the sight of the magnificent ship before her that would take her half way across the seas. For a moment, she wondered if it would take her closer to, or further away from Nikola, before quickly pushing the thoughts aside and looking at her father. He was deep in conversation with James. The two of them had grown closer as the days wore on, and Helen found herself enjoying James' company immensely. Occasionally Helen found herself thinking about how similar these times were to those before Nikola had made his presence so firm in her life.

Two nights previously Helen, James, and John had enjoyed an amicable, nearly enjoyable meal together. She had to admit, talking to John again in a context other than their work together at Oxford had come as a shock, and yet a pleasure to her. In no way did she love him, but there was a stability around him that made her begin to wonder if she had been foolish, as James had suggested time and time again. Sighing, she shook those thoughts into the pile with her longing for Nikola and stepped from the carriage.

A young child ran up to her and handed her a near ruined envelope. "Ma'am, a young lady has informed me this is to be delivered to you immediately before your departure." Helen looked at her confusedly, before taking a delicately folded piece of paper from the envelope.

_Helen,_

Helen's heart skipped a beat as she read her name. The writing was unmistakable.

_Oh my Helen, I truly do not know what to write. I suppose that I want you to know I am safe. As safe as a Sanguine Vampirist can be, that is. Your medicine has sustained me, and I am pleased to inform you my taste for wine has return. Thank the higher powers._

_Forgive me, I do not intend to make light of this situation. I want to thank you, for not looking for me yourself. You did twist my words for your purpose, but I would have expected no less from you. My sources tell me you appear happier by the day. That is why I have decided to write to you now. I do certainly hope this reached you before your ship leaves. You are going to have the adventure of a life time, I can tell you that much. This is what you were meant for, my Helen. I am happy in a way that by leaving you, you have had the chance to take this opportunity with your father._

_I want you to know where I am now, although I do not expect you to come looking for me. More to this, I do not want you to. I am in the Russian Empire. It is cold, but it reminds me so of my home in Serbia._

_There is a more selfish reason I am writing this letter. Please go to my mother. Tell her where I am, tell her I am safe. Please, share tea with her. She would have loved you…_

_I do, still. Please do not ever doubt that._

* * *

><p><em><em>**AN - I don't know why but I'm not happy with this but I have the next three chapters planned out so hopefully it won't be so long between updates (provided work doesn't throw a million more shifts on me). Review?**

**CORRECTION - previous to this edit, I incorrectly referred to the Russian Empire as "Russia" - my epic bad. I apologise and would like to say I did realise after I posted but was too lazy to come back until the morning after. It's fixed now. Also, in case you're curious, at this point in time Tsar Alexander III ruled. *happy face* my favourite of all the Tsars.**


	13. Old Friends

**AN - This is entirely for chartreuseian, I'm whoring my services to get a oneshot out of her. There is no point denying the facts.**

* * *

><p>"Helen? We're ready to board." Gregory walked up behind Helen as she quickly folded the letter into a small square and placed it in a pocket. "What was that the child gave you?"<p>

"Oh, it's nothing… a communique from an old friend, wishing me well on this trip." It wasn't entirely a lie, but Helen could see her father knew there was something more. She had no doubt that soon James would be extracting the truth from her on her father's wishes. Helen stepped shakily onto the unstable bridge across to the ship, the small heel on her boot making the task slightly difficult however not unmanageable. Holding the railing firmly she walked slowly, taking in the smell of the water, the burning coal, the sound of the steam beginning to build. There were already many people aboard, some business men, most heading over to India to try to gain a fortune from the spice trade.

"You know James, I never really liked ships. They're magnificent to look at, wonderful to dream off, but truly terrifying to be aboard."

Helen heard James chuckle behind her. "Truly, you think nothing of tackling a dangerous Abnormal, but fear a ship that has stood the test of time? You certainly are an enigma some days, my dear."

Helen smiled softly. "Never let them know what you're thinking," she said quietly to herself. "Always a mystery, never a disappointment." These were Nikola's words, he'd used them when they first met, when she'd asked why he was so quiet and reserved.

The ship's hull creaked around them as Helen strolled through the lower levels with James. "So remind me again, exactly why am I getting one of my best dresses filthy?"

Over the past week Helen had learnt the ship's layout nearly completely, however this was a part she was still unfamiliar with, having had no need previously to be this close to the coal rooms.

"No one said you should wear such lovely attire. That dress is impractical, to say the least."

Helen shot him a look. "You said you had a surprise for me. I thought perhaps dinner, fine wine, and perhaps even a dance with a good friend. Not trudging through the bowels of a ship."

"Trust me Helen, this surprise is worth it. The privacy is very much needed as well; I could hardly organise this to happen in the dining hall."

"We will be docking in Cape Town tomorrow, Father was hoping to leave to ship for the day. It's already past midnight…"

"Helen, when have I ever done something without reason? Please, trust me. The surprise is worth the inconvenience."

Helen relented and followed James for another few moments before they came to a locked door. James pulled a key from his pocket, earning himself another quizzical look. Unlocking the door, he held out his arm, inviting Helen to enter first. Pulling her skirt up slightly to stop it catching on the risen entry point, Helen stepped over and into the room. Look around, she saw nothing but a room filled with bags of coal.

"James, what on earth?"

He pulled out a pocket watch, and flipped it open. "Any moment now. Just be patient, Helen."

Helen stood silently growing more impatient as the seconds passed before all of a sudden a bright red flash engulfed the room. Helen blinked as the colours returned before stifling a scream with the back of her hand.

"John?" Helen exclaimed, trying to figure out how on earth he had appeared in front of her so suddenly.

"It worked!" James walked up to John, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "I told you it would work."

"How?" Helen stood, still speechless.

"We all gained something different from the Blood, Helen. This is my gift." John stood in front of her, grinning widely. Slowly the shock left Helen's body and she began to smile. "But how? It's impossible."

"Nothing is impossible; I think we've shown that over the past months if nothing else."

"After Tesla's transformation, you were rather engulfed with assisting him – John discovered he too had gained something rather extraordinary. Like Nigel's gift, it took quite a bit to control. We're not sure exactly what would happen if he rematerialized somewhere solid. Say a wall, for example, but one does not have to know much to know that it would be a less than desirable outcome. So we began to practise in fields. Often without much luck, I tell you, it was more than amusing to see him end up at the bottom of a lake. More than once a suit was ruined. However, after a month or so, John could teleport inside a room. I gave him the schematics of this ship before we left and arranged a time…"

Helen looked again at John's grin and found herself grinning back, for the first time in a long time her entire being was filled with curious joy. "This is absolutely magnificent!" Helen's eyes fell to John's hands. "What have you in the bags?"

"Wine, whiskey, glasses, and cigars."

"Good chap," James said, taking the bag from John and settling himself on an overturned crate. "Pull yourself up a crate, Helen. It's time for a night of old friends, don't you think?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Naww cute. I really needed a bit of not angsty fun before... well I can't tell you but it'll make you sob a little if you're anything like me. Review, for as it has been said I'm a bit of a whore and the more reviews I get the more I post. Let's be honest here. Also - I won't update until I hit 100 review :D because I am just evil.<strong>


	14. True Colours and the Colourblind

**AN - Thanks to chartreuseian (AGAIN) for betaing this. She's really cool :P and inspired me to throw out some of my hoarded shit. Which after I did some of that, I did this - because this was more fun.**

**So - I've done an alternate version of last chapter and posted under Nightswimming Outtakes and Alternates but that is NOT part of the story line. Just... ya know... fun.**

**Also I'm setting a goal until you get the next update because I have it written already. 110 reviews and you'll get it :D make me happy!**

* * *

><p>It seemed it took significantly more alcohol these days to get Helen so much as slightly inebriated, however by the second bottle she was finally starting to feel a buzz. Laughter filled the room around her, and she found herself joining in. John had been recounting his various mishaps while learning to control his new found power.<p>

"And so I found myself no longer in the bath, but instead in the middle of a street somewhere in Europe, bloody freezing when you're wet with no clothes on I must say. It certainly was lucky it was late at night!"

The image filled Helen's mind and she found herself laughing hard and silently, hand clutching at her side. James poured himself some more whiskey, and refilled Helen's glass, shooting her a quick and knowing smile. She reciprocated, nodded her head slightly before taking another sip of the delicious liquid. The air was warm around them, the lower levels of the ship perpetually warmed by the burning coal.

James held up the empty bottle, and stood. "I'll have to go to my room and get some more."

"I would be faster," John said as he started to stand.

"No, no. I could do with the walk. My legs are stiff from sitting here so long."

"For all your talents dear boy, subtlety isn't one of them," John quipped, and Helen found herself blushing.

James said nothing, and left the room quickly. Helen sat there for a moment, silence thick around them.

"How are you, Helen?" John's voice was soft, and his eyes were filled with a sadness that made Helen's heart ache when she looked at him. While she wasn't sure they'd ever be what she had hope she and Nikola would be, hurting John was never her intention. Despite Nikola's constant protests, she knew he was a truly good man.

"I am doing well, John. Despite what James seems to think, I really am. I have missed your friendship. Seeing you has been more than enjoyable."

John stood and walked toward her before taking a seat on the rickety crate beside her. "Missed my friendship? Helen I have thought about you every day since you left. I have missed you. Missed your smile, your laugh… I have missed your touch."

Helen shuffled back away from him, the proximity causing her body to betray her heart. "Please, John. Nothing has changed." It was a lie. Part of her had been considering, thinking, deciding while another part of her clung to something that she was almost sure was nothing.

John regarded her for a moment before choosing to place a hand on her forearm, gently tracing circles there with his thumb. "My Helen…"

Helen bit her tongue, fighting the urge to tell him that she would never be his Helen. She knew it was foolish. She should give in to this; she should let herself be his. It was possible that Nikola was never coming back. Helen closed her eyes, willing herself to stay composed.

"John…"

"Helen, don't. Don't do this. You won't tell me the truth, and to be honest I don't want to hear it. I don't want to know why you left. I don't want to know why you're so heartbroken because I know it wasn't me. I know I don't hold your heart like that. But I can give you stability. I can give you options. I can give you love. Even if it takes years for you to realise you love me back."

"John, I loved you when I said it. I love you still. I don't love you in a way that could allow me to be yours. Please."

The determination in John's eyes wavered for a moment, before he composed himself quickly. "Close your eyes, Helen."

Unsure as to why, Helen followed his command, closing her eyes tightly. She felt him shift next to her, and soon felt him closer than she would've allowed. She should have pushed him away, and she knew what he was about to do. The part of her body that was screaming for the companionship was quickly winning her inner battle. She hadn't realised how lonely she'd been until she wasn't lonely anymore. She didn't want to be lonely anymore. Which is why, when John leant in to kiss her, she didn't pull back. She lifted a hand up to his cheek and held it there. When he realised she wasn't about to hit him, he deepened the kiss, and Helen allowed his tongue access.

He was rough, nothing like when Nikola had made love to her. He wasn't gentle, but nor did he hurt her.

They lay there, Helen's head pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. For a moment she allowed herself to believe she'd done the right thing – she and John could make a life together. She would be safe and could continue her work. That was until John spoke.

"You've made the right choice," he said softly. "I love you."

Helen sat up, pulling her under slip on. "Please don't say that, John." Tears threatened to make an appearance as Helen struggled with the dress, managing to lace it messily behind her back.

"Say what? That I love you? You let us lie together and expect me to not say that I love you?"

"Yes."

"I took you for many things, Helen Magnus. Until tonight a trollop wasn't one of them."

"If I had a firearm right now, John… you wouldn't have a chance to leave this room."

John looked at her, sorrow filling his eyes. "Please, Helen. I didn't mean that…"

"Leave. Now! Leave me be!"

With that John stood, doing up the buttons on his pants. "I would do anything for you, Helen. Anything you ask of me. Please don't ask me to leave." He looked at her once more, silently begging her to take back her words before disappearing from the room. Helen sat back down on the crate and waited silently for James to return. By the time James came back through the door, Helen was having a hard time holding back the tears. He looked around the room; confusion crossed his face as he quickly took in the scene. Helen could see his eyes as he noticed her corset wasn't laced correctly, and her shoes are across the room.

"Not quite what I had expected. Where is he now?"

Helen shrugged before standing and picking up her shoes. "Please take me back to my room, James." Helen held her meek voice steady as James placed an arm carefully across her shoulders.

They walked in silence together back to Helen's room. The halls were empty, the time on the grandfather clock reading that it was nearly 4am.

James took Helen's key from her hand and opened the door. He helped Helen over to the bed, letting her sit as he poured water into a glass for her. Handing it to her, he spoke "Helen… what happened?"

She didn't say anything for a good few moments before looking up. "I'm not a trollop, James. I'm not." The tears she'd been holding back spilled over and she began to sob. James sat there uncomfortably for a moment before moving to sit next to her once more.

"I know that, Helen. I never suggested you were…" He rubbed her back gently. "Why don't you drink some of that, catch your breath, and tell me what happened. If you know anything of me by now it's that I will never judge your actions…"

"We… He and I…" Helen couldn't say the words, but James nodded, continuing to rub her back. "He wants so much more than I can give him. I don't love him. I can't love him like that… I'm not a wanton whore but… Surely it's worse to pretend to be happy with someone than to do what I have?"

"I'm sorry Helen; I shouldn't have tried to force John's presence upon you…"

Helen sat back and looked at James. "Don't be silly. His presence doesn't offend me. I enjoyed his company. I was certainly happier than I have been in quite some time. James, I simply don't love him. I could try to, we could try to live happily ever after and raise a large family. That is not what I want though. Not with John. Not anymore."

"Nikola isn't coming back, Helen. You need to accept that sooner or later. You can't spend your years alone."

"I wouldn't be alone. I have friends. I have you." Helen didn't make mention of her hope that perhaps Nikola would still return.

A month passed, and the trip to India had done wonders for Helen's state of mind. She found herself think about Nikola or John on only the odd occasion, enjoying the company of her father and James more and more each day. It was with sorrow that she found herself leaving the ship back onto English soil.

Winter had well set in my the time they returned, and snow coated the rooves of all the houses and building they passed as the carriage made its way back to the Magnus house. The morning was just beginning, but Helen found herself exhausted already and slightly ill from the travel. By the time they made themselves comfortable in the drawing room, Helen felt as though the smell of the freshly cooked eggs would make her sick if she had to endure it a moment longer. Thankfully at that moment a maid brought her a cup of tea and she held it under her nose, enjoying the aroma immensely before taking a long sip. The spice of the earl grey was soothing, comforting.

"And Helen's face when the creature jumped out at us!" Laughter filled the room once more as her father and James recounted their events. Smiling and shaking her head exasperatedly, Helen closed her eyes, enjoying the comfort of her own home once more.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Meep, god I hate Magnitt, so much. But it had to happen. I'M SORRY. <strong>


	15. Unexpected

**AN - So apparently 110 was too easy for you. How about I just leave you guessing as to how many I want? It's not a little number I'll tell you that. Big thanks to chartreuseian for making my mediocre ability at explaining Helen's feeling into decent to awesome, and for betaing.**

* * *

><p>Helen clutched at her stomach, trying to control the waved of nausea encompassing her body.<p>

"That. Bastard." Helen choked her words out to the empty bathroom, tears streaking her cheeks. She knew she couldn't rationally blame him entirely. She had been a willing (albeit very distraught) partner, but at the same time, she wanted nothing more than to take her problems in the form of the two best guns that her father owned and hunt him down.

Once Helen had enough composure to walk, she rinsed her mouth before making her way to her study. Taking the first pen and paper she found, she scrawled her words.

_Nikola,_

_I don't know if this will reach you, in some ways I hope it doesn't. I don't know how to tell you..._

Helen scrunched up the reach of paper, throwing it in a fit of anger. She hated him. He'd left; after he promised her he'd be there for her. Although she'd come to accept that he was no longer here, now she desperately needed him and resented him for his choice. He was supposed to be here.

Wiping away her tears, she walked across the room, picking up the piece of paper from its landing spot near the fire place. She smoothed it out on the desk, adding to it.

_After you left, I found the loneliness overwhelming. Surely no excuse for my actions; however at this stage I believe that you leaving was a show of how little you care for such matters._

_I am pregnant, Nikola. There is no way this child could be yours._

_I wanted you to know, because if I can't figure out a way to stop this from happening _now_ without losing the embryo, next time you see me I will be a mother. That is if you ever return._

_Helen._

The pen dropped from Helen's hand, ink leaking from the tip onto the paper. Her hands came up, cupping her face as tears rolled freely, dropping onto the paper. Before the ink could ruin, Helen folded the letter in three, placing it in an envelope, dropping a dollop of hot wax on it and stamping it shut.

She left it sitting on her desk, before standing and walking over to the window. Snow blanketed the grounds, and Helen had never felt more alone than she did. Something caught Helen's eye walking across the ground toward the house. It took her a moment before she recognised the figure as her father. Taking a deep breath, she knew that if she didn't ask his help now, she never would.

Helen made her way down the staircase, the air growing colder as she walked further from the main rooms, and down to her father's lab. Gregory never did light a fire in his laboratory, despite Helen's insistence that it was too cold and he'd become ill. She knocked on the door gently before pushing it open.

Gregory looked up from the microscope he was hunched over.

"Helen!" he said with a smile, before a frown came over his features. "You've been crying."

"I... Father, I need your help. I need you to not judge me." After Helen had explained the situation to her father, she looked up at him desperately. "I'm not ready for this, is there a way?" Helen looked up, the tears that she so rarely cried continued to flow freely, Helen didn't make so much as an effort to wipe them away.

"Oh, my dear girl…" Gregory stood up, walking over to his daughter. "What a mess you've gotten yourself into. He placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently. He wasn't judging her. He knew much better than that. "May I ask what you intend to tell John Druitt? He has a right to know, Helen..."

"No, Father. He has absolutely no right to have any part of this, any part of my life," Helen spat her words out, shocking her father. He said nothing in return, simply nodding. There was more to this than she was telling him, however he knew his daughter well, and he trusted her judgement, even though sometimes he wondered why.

"Well then, I'm sure there is a way. But Helen I can't guarantee it will work. Freezing the embryo is the easy part. When you decide to carry it to term... that's when we'll know if it's worked or not. Are you sure that you want this?"

Helen hesitated. Was she sure? How could she possibly be sure? A small part of her despised herself for even considering this. What kind of person would choose this path if there was another option? It was risking the life of a child needlessly. She had somewhere to live and she knew the child would be safe and cared for. No, it was the part of her that wanted a future, the part of her that wanted to be a free woman in a society of oppressive ideas, to be a part of scientific history that wanted this. With a child, that would disappear. Her future set in stone.

It wasn't that she didn't want this child. She wanted a family almost as much as she desired a scientific future. A family to raise under the watchful eye of her children's grandpapa. It was something she had dreamed of many times. But it was more than that. She wanted her children to have a free, happy life without the boundaries she had endured, the hurdles she'd jumped. No young girl should have to suffer the rigours of this demanding society and no young boy should be taught he is above a girl because of it; she'd not have it for her children. Society had so much to learn before she could justify bringing a child into it. Then there was the issue of the Sanctuary. Her work and her father's was so very dangerous. Her recent trip to India had been a prime example of the danger she could face. They'd been lucky and they'd had help, but there was a point at which Helen had wondered if she'd return home. The thrill of it was part of what kept her going. She wanted so much to continue her father's work and to help him create something great but she would not endanger a child like that.

There was another part of her though, a part desperate to prove her independence. To show the world that she could raise this child valiantly without John and without Nikola. Without any of her men. She knew that would not be the case. Nikola would be furious at her. He'd feel she'd betrayed him, and perhaps she had, but he would want to raise the child by her side regardless of his constant claims to detest them. John would insist on marriage, which was never any option. She would not force either of them to be a part of this child's life yet she knew they'd both feel obligated. They both had so much more to do in their time than start a family. Perhaps there would be a time for that in their lives but now was not it. If she was to do it, she would and could do it alone. She almost wanted to do it, if only to spite them. She wanted to be strong, wanted to be brave and independent and prove herself as she always did.

She knew though that having this child was not the way to be strong. She would protect this child the way she knew how. She was a mother and she knew it to be her duty to protect her unborn child no matter what.

Raising her head she looked her father right in the eye, pleased to see his complete and utter support shining through.

"Yes," she said through thick tears. "_This_ is what is right."

"Very well, we'll begin the process in the coming weeks. Go get some rest Helen. I'll have one of the hands bring you up some tea... I love you, my dear."

Helen stood, kissing her father on the cheek. "I love you, Father. Thank you."

Helen lay on her bed, sobs ripping from her chest as she clutched a pillow to her. She hated Nikola for leaving, wanted nothing more than the opportunity to rip him limb for limb, yet she couldn't help but cry for the lack of his arms around her. She wanted, needed, his comfort.

"Nidza..."

Her loving nickname for him was the last thing to leave her lips as she let sleep take the place of her tears.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Oh Helen, what a pickle you're in. What a pickle. As I said, the number of reviews until I update is known only to my head. So... review? :P<strong>


	16. Reunion

**AN - Way to go fanfiction with your lack of login for two days there. Thanks a heap.**

**But, no matter. So here it is... I actually wrote this ages ago and then edited it to fit in with the changes I'd make. This was written before chapter two was. Thanks to chartreuseian for being epic, as always.**

* * *

><p>Nikola held Helen's letter in his trembling hand, a loud growl escaping his throat as he ripped his vampiric claws through it. It was dated a week ago. He lifted himself from floor, drinking the last of Helen's formula before making his way from the damp, dark property he'd taken to inhabiting. The walls had mad scribbling over them, his ideas not able to stay in his head long enough before another came flying through. It was both a curse and a blessing of his change.<p>

He used the last of his money to buy a place on the next train back to London. He knew well that the trip would take a long while, yet he found himself willing the train to hurry and depart. As the train hissed, steam pouring, Nikola sat with his hand placed against the cold glass. The snow was thick on the ground. It had been a long time since he'd cried but even so he found a solitary tear making its way down his cheek. It had taken him months to accept that Helen's formula was the best way for him to cope with the burning desire for blood, by that time he'd fed on animals and come too close to feeding on a woman who'd thrown herself at him. It was that night that he drank the store Helen had provided him with. He'd spent the next week remaking the formula, and had since then perfected it. The only issue he had found was procuring the necessary ingredients.

The countryside passed, and Nikola's mind wandered to the days he and Helen had spent, her head resting in his lap as they spoke of their ideas. His hands would comb through her hair, she'd often chastise him for it, saying it took her far too long to fix again. He wasn't entirely sure what he would find when he returned. His mind ran through the possibilities for the situation that had found Helen pregnant.

The train arrived in London, and Nikola walked alone to Helen's property. He looked up at the large house, smoke pouring from the chimneys. He walked to the door and hit the knocker against the door loudly twice.

"Mr Tesla..." a young hand maiden said, answering the door. Nikola pushed passed him, not interested in pleasantries. He walked to her father's study. He couldn't search the entire house for her but he knew it was more than likely he would find Gregory in here. And he did.

Gregory stood, his features darkening as he saw Nikola standing in the door way. "If you've come to break my daughters heart some more, I suggest you leave before I have you removed..."

Nikola laughed under his breath condescendingly. "She wrote to me. I'm here to speak with her."

Gregory's eyes swept over him, obviously battling between the will to kill him, and the fact he knew that his daughter would never forgive him if he did. "She's probably sleeping. I'll go wake her."

"That won't be necessary." Nikola strode from the room, despite Gregory's protests that Helen would want some warning. "I really couldn't care less what she wants at this point," Nikola muttered under his breath, knowing it was only half true. He ran up the stairs, and pushed open the door to Helen's bedroom without so much as a knock.

"Who was it?" Nikola half shouted at a shocked Helen who was now sitting upright in her bed. "James?"

She looked terrible, black under her eyes looking as though she hadn't slept in weeks despite the fact she'd spent the majority of the past week in bed. Helen shook her head, unable to muster the words.

"Druitt?" hurt filled Nikola's voice as he realised. "Druitt? After everything. After us..." Nikola's voice was raised, and Helen looked at him, fear in her eyes.

"You left me!" Helen shouted at him, anger filling her as Nikola looked at her accusingly. "I needed you; I was hurting too, Nikola! I was scared too! I wanted to help you; I wanted you to help me! You left... after you'd promised you'd always stay..." Her voice trailed off into a whisper.

"I was hurting you, Helen! Either way I was going to hurt you. You know that."

"Yes, I did. I didn't care though; I would not have cared in the least, if you had stayed. It would've gotten better! I told you it would, I tried to comfort you. You showed me so thoroughly how terrible I was at that."

"I drank from you, Helen... did you really think I could let myself be around you after that?"

"So what? You thought leaving me alone was the best idea. And now! Now you're back, acting all high and bloody mighty because I'm pregnant? I didn't enjoy it, and I hated myself in the morning. I tried to forget.

"Have you... What are you going to do? Have you found a way… I don't know if it's possible too…" Nikola's voice was soft, beginning to regret the harsh words he'd used. He ran his hand through his hair roughly, messing it up further.

"There is a way. I haven't done it yet. Not yet. Father is helping. I can't concentrate."

Nikola walked up behind her. She turned to look at him. "I can help..." They both knew he wasn't offering selflessly. If he could help her now, it would mean he didn't have to see her carry John Druitt's child to term. At least not yet.

"Why did you come back, Nikola? Why couldn't you have just stayed away?"

"Is that what you want? Helen, do you want me gone from your life forever?"

Helen looked at him incredulously. "I want you to make up your mind. I am not your play thing. I am not here for you to love one minute and to leave the next. I suggest you leave my room. When you have decided… well it doesn't look like I'm going anywhere soon…" Helen looked down at her stomach. If she had the liberty to wear loose clothing, the small changes in her body would be near unnoticeable. As it was, the tight corset and shaped dress showed all including the smallest of bumps.

Nikola looked her over before turning and leaving the room without a word. As he walked purposefully down the corridor, he nearly ran head first into James.

"Nikola Tesla. You have decided to come back and break her heart again, I suppose?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Watson…"

"What is it about our Helen that makes good, truthful, men lie?" James asked shaking his head. "I don't particularly like the fact that you're back. In fact when Gregory informed me, I was considering finding a text on how to kill a Sanguine Vampire. As it is, we could use your help. Helen's made it clear that if there is any doubt this crazy scheme of hers won't work then she'll go through with the pregnancy now. We know what we have to do, medically. The actual process of freezing the embryo is theoretically possible. But sustaining the embryo for any extended period of time… That's another question altogether. That's where we need your help."

"You need me to design and build something that will _sustain_ the embryo over a period of time?"

James nodded.

"And what if I refuse?" Nikola knew he was going to help. He may not be able to redeem himself to Helen, but he was sure as hell going to try.

"We both know that's not going to happen, Tesla. So now, shall we stop wasting precious time and get to work."

Sighing, Nikola relented. He was too tired and drained to bother arguing with James at this stage. James was right though, the more time he spent being petty the less time he could spend trying to help Helen.

"Although…" James started. "I do think Gregory is planning on attempting to maim you at the very least after we finish this."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - My minimum to update again is 132, but I'd love 135. You should review because I've given up soda. And your reviews give me will power. To not just buy more soda and give up water. Also, Gregory maiming Nikola. Tehehe.<strong>


	17. The Only Thing That Makes Sense

**AN - So, we got to 132 eventually although it wasn't on the last chapter. But I have to forgive you this time because fanfiction is being a super tardface. Thanks as always to my sexy beta who beta'd this sexily (not sure how you can beta sexily but go with it).**

**Also, I did a valentine's fic. For smut because this is mainly angst go there. After you read this.**

* * *

><p>Helen sat on a stool across from the three men, watching them intently. They'd spent the past hour arguing about the best power source to maintain the cylindrical chamber that Nikola had designed.<p>

"We could always use my new motor design to generate power to recharge the lead-acid battery? A few modifications and I could have it ready to use in… two days."

Gregory looked over to Helen worriedly. "How many days do you suppose we have until this is no longer possible?"

"I'm nearly at two months as it is. The longer we wait…" Helen bit her lip. She knew they were running short on time. She could feel the changes in her body.

"We've compensated for the placenta…"

"That's all well and good, but I will not risk the health of this child by moving it if…" Helen faltered and touched her stomach. "I think I'm going to be ill." With that she jumped off the chair and ran from the room.

Nikola looked around at the men before saying nothing and following her. It wasn't hard to find her in the nearest bathroom; tears streaming down her cheeks ask she clutched the edge of the basin.

"Helen…"

"Nikola. Get. Out." She managed to force out before another wave of nausea flew over her and she wretched over the sink once more. Nikola stepped forward, grabbing her hair out of her face, trying desperately to not think of how many germs were being transmitted. Trying desperately not to cringe at the thought, he ran his hand over her back gently. He couldn't think of anything else to do but seeing her in such obvious discomfort was something he found very difficult to handle. He wanted to do something to help her, but there was nothing to do except to let her ride out the sickness.

Helen sobbed as she sunk down onto a chair near the bath. Nikola picked up a hand towel and handed it to her. She dabbed at her mouth before dipping it in water rubbing it over her face.

"Well that was disgusting…" Nikola said softly.

Helen looked at him, about to chastise him for being so thoughtless before she saw the worried look in his eyes.

"It's not pleasant, no. I'll be alright, Nikola. It will pass."

"I'll... I'd best get back to work…" Nikola went to leave but Helen's hand found itself resting on his forearm, silently asking him to sit back down. He looked between her and her hand for a moment, hesitating before kneeling back next to her. Helen looked at him, saying nothing. Her hand began to move softly over the material of his shirt. Her fingers were warm through the material, and Nikola felt himself longing to pull in and hold her against him.

They sat for a long while, neither of them wanting to talk, knowing that eventually they'd have to face reality again. For the moment though, they could simply be in each other's presence. That would be enough. For now.

Nikola was the first to return, leaving Helen to freshen up properly. He was met by an inquisitive look from James and a decidedly unfriendly one from Gregory. Standing opposite them uncomfortable he examined the materials he had in front of him before scrawling down the rest he'd need to complete the engine.

"How long do you think this could last, realistically?" James asked as he looked over Nikola's plans.

"It really depends on the maintenance of it. The battery means that it will be possibly to replace the engine as it eventually wears down. The problem will be when the battery needs replacing. That will happen in perhaps six month. You could try a year although I wouldn't recommend it… I can design _something _in that time… for now at least this will buy us the time needed. Theoretically though… indefinitely. Suspend a seed's germination and replant it a thousand years later and it will still grow…"

"This is slightly more difficult than botany, Mr Tesla," Gregory snapped.

Nikola fought the urge to fight back that the medicine (hardly being a science) wasn't the hard part, holding his tongue he nodded curtly. "I'll have to procure these before I can make a start. I best be on my way to do that…"

Turning to leave, he opened the door to see Helen standing there reaching for where the door handle was.

He stepped aside, letting her walk passed him purposefully. He stood, watching for a moment before Gregory's voice snapped him out of it.

"Did you not have some materials you needed Mr Tesla? Or would you prefer to stand and ogle at my daughter rather than help?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN - So... 142 as my next aim? :) make me happy? It's been 3 days soda-less and coffee less and to be quite frank I'm ready to shoot someone. If anyone wants to know why I'm doing this just ask for the link in your review and I'll explain. Is for Sanctuary for Kids.<strong>


	18. Painful Admissions

**AN - So... I submitted (tehehehe, kinky) to some pressure here and gave you a bit of smut. Also, because tbh I don't think either of these two would let me write anything but smut if I didn't do it.**

**Massive Teslen spankies, as always to my lovely and abiding chartreuseian for beta'ing this. Even though, let's be honest, she wanted to a lot. )**

**Ermmm... oh and ahhhh wow to the review count. I do love it when people go through and review every single chapter ;) thanks babe.**

* * *

><p>Nikola soon found there was beauty in his immortality when it came to helping Helen. He required much less sleep than the average man, so while her father and James were resting that evening, he was working in the lab, putting the finishing touches on his newest invention. As he began slid the battery into place, a soft knock on the door startled him from his concentration. He looked up as the door was pushing open to reveal a tired looking Helen in just her nightwear looking at him from the door way.<p>

"Helen!" Nikola pulled out his watch. "It's 3am, what are you doing awake?"

She shrugged, biting her lip and walking over to the table. "I couldn't sleep. It's been like that a lot lately."

Nikola watched her as she bent over, intently studying the machine. "Is it ready?"

"Very nearly… I just have to…" he held up the battery he'd been installing as Helen came in.

Helen nodded and sat down as Nikola began to work again. It had been something she'd always enjoyed watching, even before they were together. His face showed his intense concentration and he had a habit of muttering to himself if something changed or didn't go according to plan.

The machine whirred to life and Nikola looked up happily. "To recharge the battery, you need to keep the engine running."

Nodding, she spoke "It's…" she struggled to find the words to describe it. "Thank you, Nikola. It really does mean a lot."

Helen rested a hand on her stomach. "I know it's strange, I don't feel that different. Tender, yes, and I feel sick most of the time. But mostly I feel the same, just bloated. I thought I'd feel more. It took me so long to realise. I didn't even think when I missed… well. It wasn't until I was ill for the first time that it dawned on me."

"I know it's not my place, and I hope you'll forgive me for asking, but why? Why John? Do you love him still?" Nikola's voice betrayed his hurt. He knew he had no right to be upset by it, but he couldn't get thought of the two of them reuniting after he left.

"You left me… I was so… It hurt so much…" Helen's words were disjointed as she looked at the floor intently. I don't know why, but I thought I may find some happiness with John. I thought perhaps I'd be able to have a life with him and pretend for the rest of our lives that this had never happened." She motioned between them. "You left me and I was broken. I never wanted to be so dependent on a man for my happiness, yet I found myself broken when you left."

Nikola looked at her. "I was scared I'd hurt you if I stayed, Helen. I don't hate what I've become, but I acknowledge it's dangerous and as much as I hate to admit it, I don't understand it completely. Surely you understand that I had to leave."

"No, Nikola. You didn't have to leave. Not then. After this though, I would think it best if you did. I don't think I can take being hurt time and again every time you think you're too dangerous to be around me." Helen had rounded the table and stood in front of him, tear filled her eyes and Nikola could hear her heart beating fast. He also smelt something, familiar yet he couldn't place it. It made him want to kiss her, desperately, and so he did. Leaning forward and brushing a hand over her cheek he crushed his lips against hers. Helen froze before melting against him, pressing her body to his and granting his wanting tongue access. She moaned her body set alight by his touch.

"This is such a bad idea," he moaned as her hand roamed his chest, then his stomach, and dangerously low brushing against the tip of his growing erection.

"Terrible idea," Helen's head fell back and Nikola's lips began kissing the short skin above her collarbone that was exposed by her nightdress.

"I should stop," he murmured against her skin, not an ounce of conviction in his voice.

"Don't…" she moaned out as he nipped gently at her skin. Her body was screaming for his touch, having been denied it for far too long.

"Can't…" he managed to moan out as Helen skilfully undid his belt and pulled his shirt from its carefully and neatly tucked in place. Her bare hands grazed along the skin above his pant line making him hiss at the contact. "Oh. Oh boze molim te ne prestaju… Ja vas propustili toliko…" his native tongue slipped out as Helen's hand reached inside his pants, grasping him and stroking him softly. His hands grasped Helen's waist, pulling her flush against him before lifting her to sit on a lab table. Her nightdress lifted up above her knees, Nikola stroked her beautiful creamy leg, his hand trailing up her thigh and under the dress. "No undergarments?" he asked, shocked to find nothing acting as a barrier between the two of them.

"Uncomfortable." One worded answers where about all she could manage as Nikola's hand rested no more than an inch from where she wanted it most. Finally he shifted his hand, stroking a finger along her moistened centre before massaging her sensitive bud under his thumb.

Helen mewled with disappointment as he removed his hand far too soon, shocked when Nikola picked her up and placed her a good three feet away from him and sat on the stool again. Her shock dissipated as a sharp knock came on the door followed by James poking his head into the room.

"Helen, what are you doing down here?"

"I was thinking of asking you the same," Helen composed herself quickly, shooting James a smile. "I couldn't sleep and I came to ask Nikola how his work was coming along. As it happens, it's finished. I was about to return to my room."

Nikola spoke before James could again, "Helen, I was wondering if perhaps you're not too tired we might talk privately?"

James coughed. "Well I just came down to see if you needed help seeing as sleep seems to be alluding us all tonight. As it's finished, I suppose I'll go and see if your father needs help." He shot a warning glare at Nikola, silently telling him that if he were to upset Helen in their 'talk' he'd make good on his promise to kill him.

Within seconds of James closing the door, Helen and Nikola met in the middle, hands frantically ripping off clothing, desperately exposing each other. Helen looked at him uncertainly before slowly sinking to her knees and kissing Nikola's length tenderly before darting her tongue over the tip.

"Oh good lord…" Nikola muttered as her blonde curls fell over her face and tickled him softly. With another stroke of her hand, Helen sucked the tip into her mouth before taking more inch by inch until Nikola could feel himself touching the back of her throat. With a hum, Helen massaged the underside of him with her tongue before gently scraping her teeth back up his length. She repeated the movement again and again, humming occasionally and stroking him when she required air. Nikola's hand knotted in her hair, his eyes close to the world.

"Helen… I'm…"

She knew it was her warning but didn't stop, instead becoming more vigorous, desperate to taste him.

"Oh Christ…"

He came hard, spurting against the back of her throat. Helen swallowed eagerly, licking and sucking until his hands fell from her hair and he reached to help her up. Pulling her nightdress over her head and discarding it on the floor next to them, he lifted her now naked form to its previous position on the lab table. Kissing her softly, he pressed his hand against her before slipping a finger inside and letting his thumb flick across her clit again and again until she was lying back on her elbows. Normally she'd worry about the hygiene and safety of that but knowing her Nikola, Helen knew that it would be the most sanitary environment in the entire room. Within minutes of kissing and stroking Helen, Nikola found himself growing hard again – desperate to have her. He pressed himself against her but stopped, looking in her eyes. There was anticipation, desire, but also something else, something he desperately wanted from her but couldn't bring himself to ask.

"Helen…"

"Please…" her voice was throaty, needy, she bit her lip and he brought his thumb up to brush against where she'd just bitten.

"I'm not leaving, not unless you tell me to. I will spend my time here showing you how I... how I feel…" With that he thrust himself inside her, revelling in her tight warmness but also the comfort he felt from it. He steadied himself before thrusting into her gently time and time again, allowing time pass as he treasured every inch of her body, kissing her mouth, ears, eyelids, tweaking her nipples beneath his fingers. Helen arched against him, teetering on the edge as he nipped at her neck, whispering to her, telling her she was beautiful, telling her she was wonderful, telling her everything she'd so desperately needed to hear from him the past months.

"I love you, so much…" he whispered, so softly she would've missed it had she not been waiting for those words. Her body tingled, a fire ignited in her belly and she let out a cry as her walls clamped down around Nikola. Her fingers grasped to the edge of the table, her legs wrapped around his waist as with one last thrust he came fiercely.

"I love you too, Nikola. I never stopped loving you."

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Oh so will they be happily ever after or will fate intervene again? Review and I might let you know. My goal is... undisclosed but not impossible.<strong>


	19. Apologies and Morphine

**AN - So... you guys rock. A whole heap. Just saying, the second I updated FF went down for like 16 hours - and then the second it was up people were reviewing, apologising for not being in earlier. I was like - dude - always, what the shit FF, what the shit?**

**Thanks to chartreuseian AGAIN for betaing this - sometimes her beta notes are more amusing than the chapters. Sorry about the length of this one - I started uni this week and two days of hectic hecticness. **

**Just one more very pressing note, I realised I can't actually put links in PMs. So to anyone interested in my starving for S4K go to two-dollars-a-day . blogspot . com . au minus the spaces.**

* * *

><p>Nikola sat at Helen's bedside, absentmindedly stroking a thumb over her hand and he waited for her to wake up. Both James and Gregory had said she'd probably much rather be alone to grieve for her child. While she hadn't lost it so to speak, it was no longer a part of her and no man should be foolish enough to think that that would not be a reason for Helen to grieve. The only difference was that Nikola believed she'd need comfort. She could certainly grieve alone, if left to it. She'd move on and start a life she'd been dreaming of having. The thought of having her grieve alone however made Nikola ill. He'd let her suffer enough with his extended absence. He wouldn't let her again if he had the choice.<p>

The transplantation process of the embryo to the container had been a success, the development stalled and both mother and child appeared to be healthy enough.

Helen's hand twitched under Nikola's before turning palm up and wrapping its fingers around his. He smiled slightly, holding her hand in his and watching her face for her eyes to open. A small flutter of her eyes and Helen turned her head to try to look at her hand.

"Nikola?" she asked drowsily.

"Zdravo," he greeted her in his native tongue. "Do you hurt?" His worry came through in his voice.

She shook her head before opening her eyes properly. "Actually, yes. But probably not anywhere you want to hear about," she smiled slightly, and Nikola laughed softly.

"Do you want to sit up?" he began to look around for extra cushions to prop behind her.

Before he could find any Helen replied, "Oh no, definitely not." She tried to roll over but a cringe of pain flashed over her face.

Nikola's grip on her hand tightened. "I'm going to get you morphine." He took his hand from hers and left the room quickly. He intended to be back to be with her as quickly as vampiricly possible.

He ran up down the long corridor and found Gregory's office without problem, knocking on the door he was greeted with a rough "Enter".

"Helen's awake, in a great deal of pain."

Gregory said nothing, merely nodded and rising from his seated place at his desk. Scouring the top shelf above his desk he pulled a bottle and needle from the back row. Nikola held his hand out expectantly, only to receive a look of contempt. "You really think I would let you inject my daughter with anything? Mr Tesla, only Lord knows what your intentions with my daughter are, what you hope to achieve, hope to gain from your presence here. However it takes not a genius or a God to make a reasonable hypothesis. I hope you know that the only reason I am yet to throw you head first from my property is that my dear Helen has requested – her reasoning unknown – that I don't do so. You have hurt her, crushed her, destroyed the joyous smile that I used to be greeted with every morning. While I am well aware that this child is not yours, you are the sole reason, the catalyst, for the events that led to it. You are less than welcome in my home, and I trust you less than the man who did get her pregnant. At least he did not break my daughter's heart."

Nikola stood there dumbfounded for a moment before realising that if he were to win Helen's heart, he'd have to win her father's trust first. A task that had to be started with an apology, not something he was particularly experienced at.

"Sir, it was not my intention to cause Helen any unnecessary hurt. If I had my life again and the knowledge I do now, I would change my decision to leave. However I can't, and as both yourself, and James for that matter, have made painfully clear that I cannot make a penance, I am left to live with my decision. I too am left to deal with the unseen consequences. I have made my apology to Helen, one that I believe that she has accepted, and I will to you. I truly regret that I hurt her, I am sorry that I left without thanking you for the help provided in a time of need. Although I am unsure of how it will be of consequence to you, I must tell you that I love Helen. Had it been my choice, our… courting… would not have been shrouded in secrecy from the start. Had it been my choice, I would have married her months ago. However as I found very quickly, when Helen has a plan, one does not simply stand in the way of it. It is not an excuse, I am aware, but I hope it serves in the way of an explanation." Nikola paused, wondering if he should continue with his train of thought. Perhaps Gregory would appreciate his honesty as much as Helen had always claimed to. "As for Druitt, he is a roach in my opinion, while he took the love Helen offered, he should have known far better than to take advantage of a woman such as Helen. I think you underestimate the hurt that he has caused her."

Gregory watched Nikola intently for a moment before nodding again. "You're wrong in one regard there Mr Tesla, it would always mean something for a man to love my daughter. She is the most precious thing I have in my life and do not underestimate the lengths I would go to in order to keep her safe from harm. She may be physically capable of defending herself, however if so much as one tear is shed by her because of you, I want you to know that I will kill you."

Casually as though their conversation had not occurred, Gregory walked from the room, needle and vial in hand. Nikola shook his head, shocked, before turning on his heel to follow him.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Can I get to 170? That would kind of make my week.<strong>


	20. Mended Friendships

**AN - Chartreuseian is a freaking bitch. I'm lying in bed, just chosen my Stargate ep for the night, snuggled down. DING. Review. Hit 170. Damn it. Now I feel guilty and have to update. Me no care that she is beta now. Me is grumpy.**

**BUT THANK YOU TO EVERY OTHER AWESOME PERSON WHO REVIEWED. I HAVE A BRIBE FOR YOU AT THE BOTTOM. IT'S EPIC.**

**Also, could everyone just go and send loveactuallyfan a PM poking her to update. I get she's busy and all but I am missing her teslen.**

* * *

><p>The next time Helen woke, she found herself looking at the familiar surrounds of her bedroom. No doubt her father had had her moved here when he knew she was medically fine. With a pained groan, she rolled to her side and rubbed over an ache in her lower belly. Her mind was groggy, and her body felt like it had been thrown from a building. Looking at the window, the late afternoon sun filtered in through the closed curtains.<p>

A voice came from behind her. "Would you like them opened?"

A small smile graced her mouth, and she nodded silently. She waited as she heard footsteps and Nikola's frame came into view. He pushed them open, sun warm on her skin in drastic contrast to the snow she could see still covering the grounds. Nikola walked to the bed, sitting on the edge, his hand placed palm down on the soft covers.

"Did it work?" she blurted out her burning question.

Relief flooded her body as Nikola nodded. Her hand reached out and fell over Nikola's. He flipped his hand, grasping hers tightly, unsure why such a simply gesture made him feel so much.

"Could you help me? I need to sit up and drink something…"

Nikola stood, leaning over Helen and wrapping his arms tight around her torso. Helen's arms responded, wrapping around his shoulders, her fingers lacing behind his neck. Lifting gently, he adjusted the pillows behind her before letting her sit back gingerly. Helen reached over and grabbed the cup on the side table. She drank gratefully, her mind slowly beginning to clear.

"Helen… are you… I mean… how are you feeling?" Nikola stumbled over his words, not sure how to pose the question.

"Sore…" Helen looked at him. "Oh, you mean… I'm… I honestly don't know. I feel like I should want to cry, but I don't. I suppose it'll hit me, soon. Right now though, I really am okay. Thank you, though. For asking…"

"Well, you've always had a way of pretending to be okay, being strong for everyone else's wishes..."

"You're a wonderful friend Nikola."

Nikola felt his face fall. He knew it shouldn't have hurt him as much as it did…

"Oh, no. I didn't mean…" Helen's hand grabbed his again. "You're so much more than that, but under it all, we still have a friendship that I like to think isn't going to be broken too easily."

Nikola heard Helen's joyous laugh as he morphed into his vampiric from, sprinting to the other end of the garden and morphing back again. Two months had passed since the foetus was removed, and while Helen had certainly had her downs, the three of them, Nikola, James, and Helen, had shared in quite a few ups. James had taken Nikola aside, and threatened him in a similar fashion to which Gregory had. The difference being that once James had had his say, they'd gotten on with their lives. Nikola found he actually enjoyed, god forbid, his company. He was interesting to talk to and unafraid to speak his mind. That and his new deductive skills had Nikola fascinated.

Thankfully though, today James was required for his newly found detective work, leaving Nikola to spend some much desired time with Helen. They hadn't thrown themselves back to how they were before he left, yet they still often found themselves sneaking a kiss in the halls, or Nikola sharing Helen's bed, if only for the comfort their bodies provided each other. The feel of another body helped them keep a grip on what was real, and what wasn't.

He made his way back over to Helen, taking a moment to enjoy the way her long blonde hair shone in the autumn sun. It was nearing midday, and while the snow was gone, and the ground dry, the air held a chill to it. Nikola saw Helen shiver as he approached; her hands were bunched under the thick material of her over coat. He was about to suggest they go inside when a small smile touched her lips and she leant her head back, the sun warming the skin on her exposed neck.

Nikola said nothing as he sat down next to her, Helen tilted her head to the side, letting it rest on Nikola's shoulder.

"You are truly amazing…" she said quietly, thinking about Nikola's control over his abilities.

"Honestly, I can't completely control it. There are times when I'm almost sure I'm about to lose control."

"Such as?" Helen sat up and looked at him. He looked down sheepishly.

"I'm not sure you want to know the answer to that."

"Not…"

Nikola nodded, embarrassment flooding himself as he thought to when he had her around him, the near uncontrollable urge to drink from her again. It wasn't in a way that could be described as thirst. More marking her as his. Claiming her. He had felt an extraordinary desire to keep her, protect her, and have her. Animalistic almost.

"Well that's…" Helen had no words. She knew it was wrong but in a strange way she almost felt flattered.

"Please don't hate me, I wouldn't have. I would have stopped."

Helen shook her head and looked at him incredulously. "Honestly, for a man who is so sure of himself around others, you think I'm going to hate you for that? Nikola… I'm not sure I could ever truly hate you. Trust me, I've tried. At the end of the day, I think there's a part of you that I will love. Not matter how infuriating you can be." She grinned at him, softening her words.

"So one might say, you're under my spell?" Nikola said in a terribly forced fake English accent, with a cheeky grin.

"Not if you ever try to force that accent again. You make a mockery of us."

"Helen the English make a mockery of themselves."

Helen glared at him playfully. She knew he was just stirring her, trying to elicit a reaction. Her mind toyed with various ways to punish him before she found herself kissing him. Nikola caught on quickly, his hand grasping her waist as he deepened the kiss hungrily.

Before he had a chance to do any more though, her lips pulled from his and she jumped up, grinning at his dumbfounded look before running further from the house. He lifted himself from the grass, shaking his head.

"Cheeky little…" he let her run for a few more seconds before sprinting after her. Within a few seconds he had her around the waist, her back against a tree, his lips pressing desperately against hers, their tongues dancing.

"That was just mean," he growl, nipping at her bottom lip as her hands played casually with the buttons of his jacket.

"Care to punish me?" Helen's grin faded, leaving a lustful seductive look in its wake. Nikola did nothing except growl again, grabbing her wrists and pinning her hands above her head, claiming her mouth again.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - So, is the bribe obvious yet? I will update again at 180. But. You will get smut if you hit 18...5. Yeah, 185. Go on. Do it. Doooo ittttt. Also, go give chartreuseian a banana. *evil laugh*<strong>


	21. Trees

**AN - Spankies to chartreuseian for beta, as always. She rockin' yo. So, wow. Freaking wow. Wow wow wow wow wow. Could you guys have taken my challenge and raised me WOW any better? I wake up this morning and am all SAYYYYWHHHHAAA! You hit my goal, over-freaking-night. So I do apologise that I didn't update then but you know how it is... you were too quick and ... it may not have been finished... or actually... the smut wasn't even started... But it's here now!**

* * *

><p>Helen squirmed against Nikola's hold half-heartedly, her heart racing as his lips attacked her neck. He moved his hand slightly, holding her wrists with one hand and bringing the other down the part her coat, running his fingers over her exposed collarbone. She shuddered underneath his touch, a heat filling her from the inside out; her excitement heightened by the dominant nature Nikola had taken on, holding her still against the tree.<p>

Helen snuck a glance toward the property, ensuring they were hidden enough. If this was going where she so hoped it was, needless to say no one needed to bear witness to their wonderful indiscretions.

"No one can see us," Nikola murmured as though reading her mind. He let go of her wrists a moment to push her coat from her body. He had expected her to complain of the cold, instead she reached an arm around her back to begin to unlace the tight corset. Nikola grabbed her hands again. "Not a chance. I'm punishing you, remember?"

Helen's body responded immediately to his words, her heat turning into desperate arousal. She tried to lift her leg around his waist, but her heavy skirt mixed with his body pressed against her prevented it, and she was left there as his hands roamed her still covered torso unable to do anything to quell the feeling except try to create friction by rubbing her legs together. It wasn't nearly enough, and soon she was moaning uncontrollably as Nikola mercifully bunched her skirt and stroked her wetness through her linen undergarments. He played with her for a moment before ripping them from her body in one swift move, tearing the fabric to pieces.

Helen gasped, trying to think of a way to admonish him but on found her mind focusing on how she could now feel his erection pressing against her bare skin through his pants. The air was cold against her now exposed centre, sending a shiver down her spine but doing nothing to appease the desperate beast within her, growling, frantic for Nikola's touch. He pulled her hands down, placing them palm down against her skirt. She took the fabric in her hands, and watched as Nikola sunk to the ground, grabbed her leg throwing it over his shoulder and pressed his lips to the inside of her thigh. They'd not experimented much with this particular action, but Helen knew just how quickly he could bring her to the edge with a few well-placed flicks of his tongue. Anticipation had her trying to shuffle closer to his mouth. Nikola growled placing both hands hard on her hips and pushing her back against the tree. "What did I just say?"

Helen whimpered but kept still as his mouth worked painfully slowly toward the part of her that was begging most for its attention. When he finally reached her, he was too gentle, far too soft. She needed more, she was ready to beg when he suddenly thrust two fingers inside, eliciting a guttural cry from Helen as her head fell back hard again the tree. She knew her head would hurt later but couldn't bring herself to care as Nikola pulled his fingers out again, rubbing over her wetness before pushing them back in and sucking her clit between his teeth. Helen could feel every nerve that he touched, her entirely body responding happily to his ministrations. She felt her walls tightening around Nikola's fingers; she had to fight to resist the urge to move her hips, to bring herself over the edge she was hovering on. Helen bit her lip, her eyes fell shut and her breathing quickened. Just as she felt her release coming on, Nikola stood, removing all contact from her. She opened her eyes desperately, she _needed _this.

"Punishment." Nikola turned to walk away from her but found himself pushed to the ground, Helen's legs either side of his hips, her hand on his chest.

"Is over," she added before pressing her lips against his. She could taste herself on him and a part of her loved it. It was Nikola's turn to moan as Helen ripped open his thick linen shirt and scraped her finger nails down his chest. His hand came up to cup the side of her breast, the movement pushing her nipple to poke out the top of her dress. He squeezed it roughly between his thumb and index fingers as Helen's teeth scraped hungrily down his neck. He could feel her wetness starting to soak into his linen pants, and as though she knew what he was thinking, she sat up and undid his pants, pulling his hardness out into her hand and stroking it gently. His eyes darkened as Helen bent down to take the tip in her mouth, sucking and flicking her tongue across the tip. A deep growl emerged from him as he fought the vampiric change he'd minutes ago been embracing. Helen giggled with him in her mouth and he groaned, biting his lip hard throwing his head back again the soft grass. Before he knew it though Helen was straddling him again, brushing against him with her wetness. He was about to thrust up into her when she took her own accord and sunk down onto him.

She whimpered happily at the sensation. Since their time in the laboratory, she'd spent far too long thinking about this, thinking about how wonderful he felt filling her completely. She rode him, her long blonde hair falling free of its confines and brushing against her face as she moved. Nikola's hands were on her still clothed waist, his hips moving to meet her thrust for thrust.

Leaning down, she kissed him, gently pressing her lips against his, tasting, savouring him. Helen's body ached for its release, finding her close to the edge again within a matter of minutes.

"Oh, God. Helen…" Nikola forced out through gritted teeth as he fought his own release. He had hoped that closing his eyes would help but all it did was let him imagine nothing but Helen riding him, that look of lust that currently had its place. Her blue eyes were darkened, cheeks flushed, he could smell how close she was. Closing his eyes only enhanced every other sense he had.

Her walls fluttered softly at first, Helen paused, trying to hold onto the feeling but as Nikola continue to move ever so slightly inside her she found herself crying out indiscriminatingly. Nikola couldn't hold on any longer and thrust inside her hard one more time as he felt himself come undone with her.

Helen giggled and fell forward, Nikola's arms wrapped around her and he kissed her neck.

"What is so funny?" Nikola asked.

"We are so dysfunctional."

Nikola frowned, he couldn't see her face, but he could feel her smile against his ear. Surely it wasn't something to be happy about.

"Well, think about it Nidza. Have you ever heard of a relationship like ours?"

"People court each other all the time," his confusion was betrayed in his voice.

"We have sex," she pointed out. "And we're not engaged. I'm sure we're not the only people, but the fact we hold such a… standing… so to speak… in society. It's not like I'm a common lady of the night. What is it about you that a makes me so…" Helen searched for the right word.

"Insatiable?" Nikola offered.

Helen laughed. "Precisely."

"Would you like me to ask you to marry you? I will… Although, I'm not sure it'd be with your father's permission. He hates me quite a bit."

"Oh he does not. He's just scared he'll have to comfort me again. No father wants to see their daughter upset."

"You didn't answer the question…" Nikola rolled Helen off him and adjusting his pants, buttoning them with one hand, never taking his eyes off hers.

"One day maybe. I don't think we should have to though. Why should we be forced to be married simply because we love each other? Honestly, some customs don't make any sense. Sometimes I just don't understand this world."

Nikola kissed her again, "I love you, my Helen."

Helen grinned. "Which is why you're buying me new undergarments."

Nikola spluttered. "What?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN - Nikola... Underwear shopping... I think I have another challenge... 205 and I'll do an underwear shopping outtake and also the next chapter - pure awkward and super cute Teslen. ;) 200 flat gets you the next update. Oh, and another reason for you to review. PLEASE READ MY RAMBLES HERE. As of tomorrow I am going to be living off two dollars a day for all my food and drink to raise money for Sanctuary For Kids. Info can be found on their community page. So, wish me luck!<strong>


	22. Artefacts

**AN – Okay, many thanks to those who have reviewed, and I do sincerely apologise I didn't get this up the second I hit 200 reviews. Big political changes in Aus yesterday stole my attention, as well as the flu and the fact I'm really, really hungry. Many thanks to the people from fanfiction who have sponsored myself and loveactuallyfan in our endeavour to live off $2 a day for a week to raise money for Sanctuary for Kids. If you want to sponsor, ask for details in your review. :)**

**This hasn't been beta'd so forgive any errors – I wanted to get it up (that's what she said) and chartreuseian was unavailable. I will also be working on your lovely little undergarment shopping outtake now.**

* * *

><p>By the time the summer break from Oxford came around, Nikola had been fully informed of exactly what her father did. He had known for quite some time about the existence of creatures drastically different to anything he'd known, often with abilities so far beyond what he could imagine (for Nikola Tesla, that was certainly saying something). It had taken Helen a very long talk with Gregory to convince him that Nikola was worth trusting with all the details, but ultimately it had proved an invaluable step in their pursuit of knowledge. That brought them to today.<p>

Nikola sat, eyes flittering over the details of a map that Helen had brought into them before running back upstairs to help James catalogue the new artefacts that had just arrived from their trip to India months back. Although Nikola was unsure why, Gregory had specifically requested Nikola be the one to assist him in searching the best possible entry point for a cave system in Northern China.

"What about here? No climbing equipment would be needed." Nikola pointed to an area close to Pekin.

Gregory walked around the table to see as Nikola did. "That's a populated area, and it'd be far too dangerous to try to enter the caves after nightfall." His eyes poured over the map before finding a place about fifty miles west of Nikola's suggestion. "Here would be far better."

Nikola shook his head. "It would take you far longer than necessary to walk to where you believe this…"

"Stenopelhabbilis," Gregory finished Nikola's sentence.

"Is hiding. Do you not think it'd be better to take the mere risk of being seen entering the caves than the risk of walking thirty miles to find that the way had been blocked by a rock fall? We know that the area from here…" Nikola pointed to his entry point. "To here…" He pointed to the last known hiding place of the Stenopelhabblis. "Is clear. It is perhaps fifteen miles, at least a five hour walk as it is. There are water systems here, and here. Staying overnight in the caves is possible, but not necessary given the walking time. Your way, you have no choice."

Gregory watched Nikola as he made his case before nodding. He'd known when Nikola had first seen the spot that it's where they had to enter. He simply wanted to see the man speak with some conviction to his argument. Helen had said he had an extraordinary ability to convince people to see his way when he was passionate about something. She was right.

"Alright then, Mr Tesla. We'll do it your way. Now, I believe James will need some help with some of the larger artefacts I have procured. Perhaps you could go and help him while I write the appropriate requests for entry into China?"

* * *

><p>"James! What an inappropriate question!"<p>

Nikola approached the door to one of Gregory's many storage rooms to hear Helen admonishing James. He could tell simply by her voice that she was more embarrassed than angry, peaking his curiosity as to what could have possibly been asked.

"Oh, hardly Helen. We both know that he would do anything for you. Have you not even considered the possibility of letting John back into your life?"

"I…"

Nikola froze, near dreading her answer.

"Yes."

He stood, unable to move. He wasn't sure he wanted to hear more of the conversation, but he couldn't bring himself to leave, to walk away.

"Yes I suppose I have, but it could never be in the way he wants it to be. I tried, James. I tried so very hard to love him the way he loves me. He was a fantastic friend, and had circumstances been different, I would have been lucky to marry him."

James sighed. "I know that Helen, and I'm not asking you to let him back in and that all will be forgiven. I'm asking you to let him try to make amends for his words."

He heard someone put something down and another crate being opened. "That could be easier said than done."

There were footsteps toward the door, and suddenly it opened. "You can come in Nikola. I'm sure Helen would be just fine with you hearing this conversation."

"I…"

James chuckled. "Please. No need to explain. I'm sure you weren't deliberately invading our privacy. I assume you found an entry point?"

Nikola nodded. "I almost think he was baiting me. He made me argue out the reasons before he finally agreed to my suggestion."

"Entirely likely. Although that does mean he hates you slightly less than he did before. At least now he's giving you a chance to argue for yourself."

Helen shot James another look, one that Nikola didn't fail to see. "He does not hate you, Nikola. Trust me; my father hates very few people."

James pulled out another artefact wrapped in straw and paper, continuing where they'd left off before Nikola's entrance.

* * *

><p><strong>AN – Sorry it was a bit short, but I wanted to show Nikola's transition for Gregory hating him to tolerating him<strong>


	23. Invitations for Change

**AN - Many spankies to chartreuseian for betaing, as per usual. This is my last day of living off $2 so WIN.**

* * *

><p>Nikola and Helen continued their dance, hiding their relationship from the public but within her house nearly everyone knew they were much more than best friends once more. It had taken Gregory a long while to warm to the idea of Nikola staying in his house when the three of them, Helen, James and Nikola, were working together, however as far as he knew Nikola stayed in the guest quarters. Thankfully for Nikola, Gregory required much more sleep than he and as such Nikola and Helen spent most of their nights together.<p>

Sleeping in an empty bed once more was one of the things Helen was pondering , standing next to Nikola as he read his invitation to speak at the Columbia University, presenting his recently publish paper on the Alternating Current Motor.

"You'll be gone no more than two months, Nidza. You have to. This opportunity is… Nikola you may not get this again." Helen was more than aware of Nikola's aversion to speaking in public. He'd made leaps and bounds through the years that Helen had known him however the prospect of speaking in front of the American Institute of Electrical Engineers was still daunting to him.

Nikola nodded. He knew that this was an opportunity to finally show the world that he had achieved something of significance. His idea for an AC motor had been laughed at too many times for him to turn this down. "I know," Nikola said quietly, turning to face Helen. "Care to join me?"

"Nikola, you know I would but I have so much here that needs doing." The prospect of going to New York both thrilled and scared Helen. It was something she'd do very much willingly, however right now her father was counting on her to grow their work.

"I know, I know. When is it?" Nikola consulted his letter. "May. Not for months, no need to be sad yet," he said noting the look on Helen's face. He knew she was trying to hide it, trying to make him as happy about the prospect of presenting his work as possible, but there was sadness, almost a fear in her eyes.

"Well, I suppose we'd best make fantastic use of the time that we have together then…" Helen looked at him, a mischievous glint in her eye as she grabbed his waistcoat and pressed her lips hard against his. Nikola kissed her back, relishing the feel of having her so close before realising where they were standing, pulling back and looking around the empty lobby nervously, nearly sure that her father would jump out at them.

"He isn't home." Helen tried to press her lips against his again but he stopped her, earning himself an angry growl.

"Not here," he whispered before taking her hand and leading her up the stairs to the floor her room was on. Before they could reach the door to her bedroom Helen pushed Nikola against the wall and nipped at his bottom lip. She knew it was silly but a part of her was desperate to claim him, knowing that he'd be leaving her soon, if only for a short while. She wanted him to know he was hers and that she was his. More than that, she wanted to convince herself that they could make it through the time apart. They'd been apart for no more than a week since his return and during that time she knew that he was no more than an hour away from her. If she needed him, he was there. A fear coursed through her, controlling her, making her desperate for him. Nikola growled as she bit hard when he didn't open his lips for her.

"Kiss me!" she whispered furiously. Nikola looked in her eyes, confusion filling him before he granted her request, her tongue sweeping across his as her hands played with the buttons of his waist coat, undoing them one by one and running her hands across the thick linen of his shirt before making short work of those buttons too and placing her hands on his exposed chest. He hissed as she dug her nails into his skin hard. It didn't hurt him, so to speak but the sensation was a showing him a dominant side of Helen that excited him. As Helen worked her way through Nikola's clothing he walked them carefully backward to her doorway, pushing it open and kicking it closed behind him as he shrugged off what remained of his shirt and waistcoat, letting them fall haphazardly to the floor.

Helen's legs hit the side of her bed and she let herself fall backward, pulling Nikola with her. The bone of her corset was pushing into her ribs but she couldn't bring herself to care as a flurry of emotions coursed through her. Her body was screaming for his touch, he was being too gentle. This wasn't how she wanted him and so she used what leverage she had to flip the two of them over, landing on top of Nikola and crushing her lips to his before sliding back off the bed and taking his pants off roughly. She took his length in her hand and began to stroke up and down as her other hand reached behind her to unlace her corseted dress. Once she was finally able to let the corset fall undone she let the dress fall to her waist and bent forward, taking Nikola's length in her mouth. He let out a loud guttural groan, and Helen hummed in approval. She wanted to know how she affected him. Moving back up his length, Helen scrapped her teeth gently along him, her hand following her mouth. She stood up, letting her dress fall into a bunch around her ankles, pushing her undergarments down with them. She was aching for him, and she climbed on to his lap before pressing kissing his neck. She nipped at him softly, before slowly biting harder. She knew she couldn't hurt him badly, and so as she sunk down onto him, his cock filling her wonderfully, she bit down on his neck hard. Nikola let out a roar, losing control and letting his vampiric form take control. He grabbed Helen's waist, his long sharp talons scraping at her skin. His eyes were dark and his teeth sharpened. Helen ran a soft hand along his cheek and slowed her movements. Slowly he began to regain control and when he focused on Helen once more he saw a grin where'd he'd expected to see a disappointed or scared look.

"You… That was deliberate?" he asked incredulously. Helen nodded, and before she knew what was happening Nikola had flipped them back over, thrusting into her hard. Every nerve in Helen's body responded as his movements built a fire within her. She knew that she was close so she wrapped her legs around Nikola's waist, allowing him to go even deeper. She cried out softly he hit a particularly sensitive area within her, bring her to teeter on the edge.

A sound outside the room grabbed his attention and within second Nikola grabbed the bed covers and moved off Helen and lay behind her, his arm still around her waist. He threw them over them just in time for a chamber maid to enter the room. She didn't look up for a moment but when she did a shocked look overcame her, and she gasped loudly.

"Ma'am… I… Sir… Wasn't aware you were… The window… Open… Nice day out…"

Helen forced a smiled. "I'm happy with the window closed, thank you," she said curtly, giving the chamber maid a pointed look as Nikola stifled a nervous laughed against her shoulder.

"Of course…" the young lady stumbled as she half ran from the room.

"Well that was…" Nikola began speaking but Helen cut him off, spinning around to kiss him again.

"Shut up."

Helen shifted so her they lay facing each other, her leg over his hip. She could feel him pressing against her entrance and he thrust forward, entering her again in one quick movement. Helen moaned out loudly, her body now screaming out for him, her release having been ripped from her grasp just seconds before. The new position was intimate, her chest pressed again him, their lips touching, kissing softly.

"I love you, Helen. You have to believe me on that. You have no need to worry."

He thrust into her again. Helen's emotions were running high, and tears threatened to make an appearance, her body nearing her climax once more.

"Promise you'll come back to me…" she whispered, a ghost of a kiss brushing over his lips.

"Always. I will always..." He thrust into her again and Helen's walls fluttered around him, with one more thrust she came undone around him, crying out his name, her world melting around her, his arms around her holding her close to his chest as he came with her.

"I will always come back to you Helen," he whispered as she cried gently into his chest.

"I love you," she whispered against his chest as her eyes closed, sleep overcoming her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN - <strong>This one has been sitting on my computer for 5 days. I was just being a bitch, it's true. Also, I've been a so busy I forget things, like... ya know... updating. You know what helps me remember? Reviews. Just throwing that out there. As my manager says: "I don't like setting goals and figures for you to hit, but if I have to, I will."<strong>**


	24. New York Nights

**AN – Well, it's been a while. I beg of your forgiveness. I've been a tad preoccupied. This was actually written a while ago, but chartreuseian, while being an awesome beta, also made me rewrite part of it and… I am a really good procrastinator.**

**Unfortunately updates will be more spaced now that uni has started, but I will attempt at least one update a week, possibly two. Don't forget to review still though :) they make me remember that it's not the end of the world. :D xx**

May came far too soon for Nikola and he found himself standing in a park, a bag of bread crumbs with pigeons cooing around him. He threw a handful of bread crumbs to the pigeons, smiling softly as they cooed thankfully. New York certainly held some appeal for Nikola. The city smelt of opportunity, he could near feel some success, finally. There was only one thing missing. He thought of Helen, wondering what she was doing at this exact moment before remembering the time difference. In all likelihood she was sleeping, lost in dreams. A sudden pang of sadness ran through him. He missed the way she'd smile in her sleep if she was dreaming good dreams. A carelessness that he so rarely saw these days was always present when she slept. He reached into his bag containing notes for his upcoming talk and retrieved a blank piece of paper and a pen. He leant back again the bench and used his leg as a rest for the paper. He began scrawling his letter for her.

_My Helen,_

He sat there and stared out at the park. What did he want to say? It seemed insufficient to simply tell her that he missed her and that he wished she were here. They'd been around each other long enough for her to know that was true without him needing to write it for her. Yet he felt the need.

_The New York air is so cold. The sun is hidden behind a layer of unmoving clouds. It reminds me of the day in the first winter of our friendship, the ground was covered by an early snow. We sat together in front of the fire in my room, a thick blanket draped over your shoulders. Somehow you were caught in a sudden downpour of icy rain. My room in the dormitory was much closer than your house and you'd come running in, not a knock to announce yourself. So very improper for a young lady. So very Helen. Sitting in front of that fire you'd held out your hand and ran your fingertips over the bone of my bare ankle, your hand fell on my should as we sat together silently. I think that's when I first realised how your presence made me feel. In those few hours, Helen, I had felt more complete, more at peace, than I'd felt in my life._

_I suppose what I am trying to convey with my rambles is that I truly wish you were here, your head on my shoulder, your warmth radiating through me._

_I know being here is right and that the possibilities are finally opening up to me. I miss you though. So very much._

_One day, one day there will be a way for me to hear your voice no matter how far I am from you._

_I will come back to you.  
>Always.<br>I love you.  
>Nikola<em>

Nikola sighed and placed the pen back in his bag, folded the letter in half and walked to the City Hall Post Office.

"A New System of Alternate Current Motors and Transformers," Nikola spoke with a confidence he only got when he was with Helen and when he was passionate about what he was talking about. He was silent for a moment, scanning the room, observing the men. Each of them distinguished in their own right, were holding a copy of his paper in their hands.

He took a deep breath and continued with his presentation, bringing their attentions to the uses and benefits the system that he'd spent so many years devising offered.

After an hour or so, he stepped off the podium and was greeted with a chorus of applause. Nikola had done many things in his life, but the feeling of pride coursing through him was stronger than ever before.

A balding man came up to him, and shook his hand. "Fascinating, fascinating stuff. The difference this could make… Well you've convinced me young man. Come to our meeting tomorrow, Mr Tesla. There is something the men and myself which to discuss with you."

Nikola considered for a moment before nodding his consent.

"Wonderful!" the man clapped his hand down on Nikola's shoulders, making Nikola cringe.

"This was a brand new suit…" he muttered to himself as he thought of the germs now ruining his suit. He knew it was unreasonable, but he had no idea what that man had touched.

Later that night Nikola sat on the bed of his hotel room, the room seemed emptier than it was. He stood, opening the door to the balcony and stepped out into the cold night air.

New York was truly beautiful.


	25. Offers

**AN – Thank you Chartreuseian who likes to make fun of my drunken writing mistakes as she betas for me. I'd be lost without her snarky remarks, not even joking. Sorry for the wait, you know. Life. Grr.**

Helen rolled over with a groan. Her arms reached out for the safety of Nikola's body only to find her bed empty yet again. Each morning she woke up alone her heart broke again. She knew it wasn't forever but something within her worried that now Nikola's genius was about to be discovered by the world he'd forget about her and make a new life without her. She knew that it was irrational at best, but that's what love does to a woman she supposed. Sitting up she pushed her wavy hair from her face and pushed back the covers just as a knock came at the door.

"Enter." Her voice was croaky from sleep still, the winter chill was taking its toll on her health and she could feel a fever coming on.

"Good morning, Ma'am." Her ladies maid entered the room with a tray of tea and toast. "I trust you slept well."

Helen was silent.

"A letter came for you, Helen." She handed it to her as she placed the tray on her bedside. Helen recognised Nikola's scrawl immediately. She couldn't hide her smile as she turned it to open it hastily. She soaked in every word he wrote, her previous worries leaving her as she read his last words.

_I will come back to you.  
>Always.<br>I love you.  
>Nikola<em>

She held the paper to her lips gently, her eyes closed. She heard the door close as her ladies maid left the room.

Helen sipped her tea, savouring its flavour and warmth as she thought of the day ahead. She had lunch with her father and intended to ask him if there was a possibility he could spare her for a couple of months. She'd been mulling over the idea for a while. She'd never seen New York before, and now there was more than enough reason to change that.

After her tea was finished Helen splashed water on her face and dressed with the help of her ladies maid. The sun was well into the sky by the time she stepped out onto the back lawns. It surprised her to see James sitting on a chair with her father. The day was sunny, and the first snows of the winter were melting. They wouldn't stick for another month. Helen was hoping that the sunlight's warmth would help her shake the fever she was developing. She walked toward James with a smile on her face. He stood and kissed her cheek tenderly.

"Helen, my dear lady. You look unwell."

Helen playfully slapped his arm. "Cheeky. I do feel a tad ill, but I think it'll pass. I could certainly do without illness this winter."

James pulled out a third chair from the table and gestured for her to sit between them Sitting carefully, Helen poured herself another cup of earl grey and savoured the warmth of the sun on her face.

"I trust you slept well, Helen?" Gregory spoke gently. He'd seen his daughter go through the ups and downs over the past weeks. Missing Nikola was certainly taking its toll on her. He worried about her, in fact he never thought he'd say it but he wished Nikola was still around. Helen had never needed someone to take care of her but it seemed that without him around Helen was missing a part of her, as though she'd been split down the centre. She was nowhere near as productive as she normal.

Helen nodded, taking a sip of her tea. "As well as I could ask for…" Her mind added 'without Nikola by my side'.

James smiled softly, putting his hand on top of hers. "That's good, because your father has asked me to travel on a job for him, and I was wondering if you'd come with me." Helen should've been happy at the request, an opportunity to see more of the world but part of her wanted to say no and run off to New York. "I think you'll like where we're going…" James had a hint of a cheeky smile in his eyes.

Gregory sat back and smiled. "Yes, I've asked James to go to New York. You see I have something there that needs attending and I thought you'd be able to find something to do in New York while he's working…"

Helen heart soared. "New York?" she tried to keep her voice steady as she spoke. "I've never been… When are we leaving?"

"This afternoon we'll get a coach to the port and a ship tomorrow morning." James' heart warmed as he saw the joy in his dearest friend's eye. John was his friend too but he'd never seen Helen giddy the way she was now, not before Nikola had entered her life. "So, you'd best start packing some things. It's colder there this time of year than here, or so I've heard."


End file.
